Thinking more about what cats would argue about on Twitter. Probably the number of times per leg they wash their legs. Really nasty cats only wash 2x per day. While a real type A cat would probably say, "hourly."

They'd probably also have the best threads about overheard conversations.

"Mr. Jingle, we all know you are making this conversation up."

"Why would I lie about my person breaking up with her boyfriend while on the toilet?"

Wet vs dry food would come up daily.

"Should we kill all the bird?" another contentious topic.

Also, huge fight re: cats on leashes being "simps".

Dipshit neutered boy cats explaining that you can become fertile again by eating only grass and then making a lot of money with a book about eating only grass.

"Forging vaccine records so your human sees no reason to take you to the vet."

LLC (limited liability cats) Twitter telling people they should steal meats from their human and sell them to other cats and then use that money to buy real estate (a cat condo or claim more space on the bed/couch).

"Can dogs be invited to the cookout? What if your partner is a dog?"

"Dr. Sebi also had a cure for FIV and that's why they took him to the vet."

Obviously that last one is only on Black Cat Twitter.

- An open letter to human media for not hiring a more cats to review Cats.

- Is Cats blackface but for cats? Followed by can only Black cats compare speciesism to racism?

- If you were in heat, which Cat from Cats would you hump?

"You just be minding your own business and then here comes a calico."