Cleric: Pelor, we beseech the. Grant us magic to bathe your foes in holy light.

Paladin: See our prayers and fill us with your holy power.

C&P: Amen.

Warlock: What are you doing?

C: Praying for magic. Don't you?

W: No.

C: Oh?

W: Watch. Yo Asmodeus! Where's my magic!?
#DnD

C: Y-you can't speak to such a powerful being that way! Even if they are a devil!

P: I liked it.

C: Hush!

W: Why not?

C: What if they don't grant you magic?

W: Then they are both a coward and in breach of their contract. I'll just sue them. Besides they need me.

C: Wait, you can sue the gods?

W: Yes. It's pr-

Asmodeus: Somebody called me?

W: Yeah, I did. I need a few spell slots. So make with the magic already.

A: Whatever. Anything *important* you need?

W: Not really, I thought you'd enjoy laughing at these two, praying for magic.

A: Who is your God?

P: Pelor.

A: Oh man, that dude sucks. I bet he made you work through a bunch of prayers that sound meaningful but are vapid nonsense just to heal somebody.

C: Our god is generous and ki-

A: Yeah, generous. As long as the collection plate moves.

W: Got em!

C: Oh yeah!? Well they said you needed them?

A: Oh really? Well they're not completely wrong. Thought it's less "need" and more "I give power to pretty much anyone who asks but a full Warlock contract is a pain-and-a-half to do so I don't want to do it again."

W: Yeah!

A: Yes. Wait, no. I give you power to make changes in the world I see fit, like spreading chaos and amusing me. I don't give you power to get in pissing contests with others.

W: Whatever *dad*!

A: Our contract says I give you powers, not that they have to be pleasant.

*later*
C: Cast fireball already!

W: I can't!

*poof*

C: What's that!?

W: An... amended contract. *ahem* "Because you talk so much crap I was confused on which orifice you casted magic with. Hope the new "southward" mana focus point is more to your liking."

C: *dies laughing*