I read about a lady who disappeared after her husband asked for a divorce. Her car was abandoned at a quarry. No note. An international search ensued. They found her at a hotel in South Africa registered under her husband's mistress's name. Agatha Christie, vengeance icon.

Then she got MARRIED AGAIN, to a new guy 13 years her junior who fully knew about the first marriage. You know that man was a Pisces. You can step on their throat and they're like, "Here is a diamond, would you like to kick me in the dick also?" God, I love Agatha Christie.

The mistress's fucking surname. Incredible. A masterstroke. That's called walking the talk. Sure, you can write 80 books, most of them crime novels, but can you LIVE them? Agatha Christie could indeed. As a Scorpio, my hat is off to this grande dame.

The STRATEGY. They had a thousand cops looking for her and apparently 15,000 volunteers. Love that misuse of people's time, all to piss off the soon-to-be-ex-husband and his woman. Spectacular work.

You just really don't expect that kind of behavior from an Agatha.

That might be the wildest Agatha move ever.

I am so proud of her. She's very dead. But she lived! Boy, did she LIVE.

Oh whoops! She was found in England at some spa. But she used her husband's mistress's surname and claimed to be from South Africa. God, that makes it even wilder - she was in the country with all the press going on. WOW AGGIE WOW.

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle gave one of Agatha Christie's gloves to a medium, presumably to see if she were dead or just lost, and I can't believe nobody was like, "Art, look. That's just...babe, no."