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Well, might as well fuck around with some tacos, gin, and restarting the Star Wars marathon
Episode I, aka Free Trade and Sailors Rights it is, then
Episode I, aka Free Trade and Sailors Rights it is, then
I mean, Naboo is totally the US, fighting for free trade, dinky army, tiny Navy, bad relations with the Native beings
Except the monarch is smarter than Jimmy Madison and tries to stave off an unequal contest
Except the monarch is smarter than Jimmy Madison and tries to stave off an unequal contest
Jesus, Naboo just lets the trade federation walk into the capital when it's an urban warfare DREAM
Make the clankers bleed for every block
Er, not bleed, uh, ooze?
Make the clankers bleed for every block
Er, not bleed, uh, ooze?
It's hard to really delve deep into the galactic-political situation when you can't get past wanting to fire Jar-Jar into the sun
Either sun will do
Either sun will do
You get a really good idea of how ineffective the Republic is when two of its chief ambassadors have to resort to gambling on a race to get the parts they need for their ship
Pretty easy to see how empire would be damn tempting
Pretty easy to see how empire would be damn tempting
Also "feel don't think" is just the LAST mantra that you want from the people who are gonna be the Republic's generals
I stand by my assertion that the jedi are only marginally better than the sith. Marginally. Just because they're not an overt death cult
I stand by my assertion that the jedi are only marginally better than the sith. Marginally. Just because they're not an overt death cult
Love how the Jedi bend all the rules with mind control and all but they won't free Anakin's mom from slavery, even when the Republic has made it illegal
Yes, this is probably gonna turn into a jedi-bashing thread
Yes, this is probably gonna turn into a jedi-bashing thread
Anyways, after 30 minutes of shit on Coruscant, and of bad acting from some of the greatest actresses and actors of the past few decades, now we're onto some maneuver warfare
When I say "maneuver," I mean "line warfare"
The Gungans treat generalship like the US in 1861
When I say "maneuver," I mean "line warfare"
The Gungans treat generalship like the US in 1861
Gungans don't even bother to send out recon or screen elements while moving in column smdh
Just relying on shields against armor
And the Trade Federation sends in armor without infantry
What is this, the Iran-Iraq War?
Just relying on shields against armor
And the Trade Federation sends in armor without infantry
What is this, the Iran-Iraq War?
Jesus, "cover" isn't something that anyone is gonna realize until Rogue One
But hey, Gungans with indirect fire
If only they used their cavalry on the flanks...
But hey, Gungans with indirect fire
If only they used their cavalry on the flanks...
Oh, sure, Gungans charging their cavalry up the middle
This isn't Waterloo, guys
Well, maybe it is, but Blücher ain't coming
No one in these movies has any concept of "flanking"
This isn't Waterloo, guys
Well, maybe it is, but Blücher ain't coming
No one in these movies has any concept of "flanking"
The good guys only seem to get by with Deus ex Machina situations
No tactics
No strategy
Just luck
Like an 8yo randomly shooting things
Which, ya know, 8yos will totally do
No tactics
No strategy
Just luck
Like an 8yo randomly shooting things
Which, ya know, 8yos will totally do
God, what a horrible movie
Just terrible
I try to keep an open mind but it's JUST SO BAD
Just terrible
I try to keep an open mind but it's JUST SO BAD
