This question + the whole conversation around it is terrifying evidence that we are seven months into a pandemic and all just running screaming into walls constantly https://twitter.com/peapodpritchard/status/1310779316540645377

The best thing you can do is spend zero time indoors, unmasked, with anyone whose COVID risk is questionable. For many, many people, that’s just not feasible. Because people need child care, schooling, and to go to work. Most places don’t have curbside groceries or easy telemed.

Because we don’t have a solid nationwide testing infrastructure, your ability to get a reliable COVID test varies by, I don’t know, day and zip code and zodiac sign and the number of raccoons in your alley.

So I can brag and say — not only can I get a COVID test for free and results in two days (thanks, city of Austin!) AND only spend time with one human being inside forever because we can get LITERALLY EVERY food, medicine, and essential item we could possibly need curbside.

“Have you spent time unmasked, indoors with people outside your household, and how many?” is a poor framework. People in your household might need to leave to work, get medical treatment, or be unserious about COVID preventions.

So you might say, “I’ve only spent time indoors with one person,” but that person is a higher risk if they leave the home and have outside contact than spending time indoors with three people who haven’t left their homes in four months.

Wild that we don’t think about evaluating our risks + building pods around these really simple questions! If your whole pod can entirely quarantine (curbside everything, no contact, even masked, with other people, even outdoors) there’s no reason your pod can’t be a dozen people.

(I mean, there are SOME reasons — some folks wouldn’t be okay with this kind of pod for all kinds of reasons, including high medical risk, etc.)

Now, whether you *trust* a dozen people is another question. I think MOUs are great ideas for pods. I think everybody should write down all the rules and agree to them. I think every person should have a personal COVID consent-to-activity framework WRITTEN DOWN.

Some of the COVID nightmare situations I have heard about include people having

- different ideas about what “quarantine” means
- different ideas about what “a short time” or “a few minutes” means
- different ideas about exposure risks while outdoors

PLEASE TALK TO EACH OTHER

One pod I’m aware of had a whole shitshow go down when one family figured “Well the husband already tested positive, we’re not going to bother quarantining from each other at home!” and didn’t, you know, explain that to the other people sharing space/kid-germs.

This, to me, is ABSOLUTELY WILD but they had never had a conversation about what it would mean to be exposed to COVID and how they would handle it! They just said “we’re a pod now, Kevin will go to the grocery store!” And Kevin got COVID. There was no plan for Kevin!

I’m less judgy about this stuff than I was early in the pandemic because I legit don’t think most people can maintain mental health and entirely isolate themselves from the outside world — I struggle with it, and I have the easiest and best possible isolation setup.

But truly, a lot of people need to learn to drink at home and ask the people they are considering spending time with (even masked, even outside) about their COVID exposure — in detail.

Also? Somebody asking you what your COVID exposure has been like isn’t asking an offensive question. They’re asking for everyone’s safety. They’re asking because they give a fuck. You should *want* to *only* hang out with people who give this kind of fuck.

Anyway I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, if we had robust, consent-centered, medically accurate sex and intimate relationship education in this country, we would not be where we are today with COVID.

But every day I stay thankful that I live in HEB curbside grocery land, have access to free COVID testing, enjoy the fuck out of my husband’s company, have a yard and a home office, and am a competent home cook. I haven’t gone inside *anywhere* since March — except to vote.

Anyway, definitely don’t hang out with strangers unmasked indoors for any length of time whatsoever AND please Jesus, just based on the dip-ass behavior I see on Instagram, don’t assume that your love for someone insulates you from being able to get COVID from them

I had to unfriend a lady today because she traveled across the country to hang out unmasked at her relative’s 95th birthday party, and no, they did not bother getting tested because they were all “being careful” DON’T BE THIS PERSON

okay one more nightmare story, which is that I know of a person who took a “staycation” in their town to get a break from parenting with their partner, and the “staycation” included going to the local nightlife district to get schwasted, and GUESS WHO CAME HOME WITH COVID

I do not know to what extent harm reduction and risk mitigation strategies could have prevented this person from bringing COVID home to their families but sweet jesus PLEASE DRINK AT HOME, YOU FOOLS

I am not ready to yet say that functional alcoholism has been a net good in my life but at least it taught me not to be ashamed of getting drunk on my own fucking couch during a pandemic!