Read on Twitter
#wank
Originally, I had opened a word doc & started writing an essay about these ppl using MLM as a weapon & quickly realized it was too big to fit on Twitter. I'll try to be succinct, but there's A LOT to unpack here.
First, I gotta comment that these charges are made 1/ https://twitter.com/Pathryn34/status/1286324561705865216
Originally, I had opened a word doc & started writing an essay about these ppl using MLM as a weapon & quickly realized it was too big to fit on Twitter. I'll try to be succinct, but there's A LOT to unpack here.
First, I gotta comment that these charges are made 1/ https://twitter.com/Pathryn34/status/1286324561705865216
against spaces full of women/AFAB ppl rather than str8 men. Str8 men make a TON of money off MLM/MSM content w/o bullying.
It often starts w/ one (1!!) MLM making charges & using moral outrage to attack a certain person (usually a woman) or groups mostly consisting of nonmen. 2/
It often starts w/ one (1!!) MLM making charges & using moral outrage to attack a certain person (usually a woman) or groups mostly consisting of nonmen. 2/
He gets nonmen to bully others & the entire group ignores MLM who speak out against this. It's usually ship related & they ignore offenses w/in their group & target a different ship.
Sometimes they attack w/in group about top/bottoming or, in this case, about sexual content 3/
Sometimes they attack w/in group about top/bottoming or, in this case, about sexual content 3/
These ppl say that romance is fine for outgroup members, but sex should remain only written/consumed ingroup. This demonizes sexual expression & ID. There are str8 men who have sex w/ other men. Should these men never have stories to ID w/?
To treat sex & sexual expression 4/
To treat sex & sexual expression 4/
as dirty/damaging is incredibly harmful for marginalized sexualities, esp bc society already tells us that we are wrong/dirty.
It makes romance 'pure' & sex sinful, which is not only entirely culturally constructed, but also incredibly dangerous to marginalized groups. 5/
It makes romance 'pure' & sex sinful, which is not only entirely culturally constructed, but also incredibly dangerous to marginalized groups. 5/
I've seen purity police write stories about abusive-in-canon relationships they turn into fluff. I've seen them dismiss domestic violence or even consider it romantic.
My abusive relationship damaged me. My one night stands haven't.
Marginalized groups are more vulnerable to 6/
My abusive relationship damaged me. My one night stands haven't.
Marginalized groups are more vulnerable to 6/
predators, esp when we believe that our desire is wrong.
To say that all MLM relationships should be healthy limits our roles in media & covers up abuse. My abusive relationship was VERY different than what I expected it to be & it took me a while to realize it was abuse. 7/
To say that all MLM relationships should be healthy limits our roles in media & covers up abuse. My abusive relationship was VERY different than what I expected it to be & it took me a while to realize it was abuse. 7/
I often explore my relationship w/ my abusers in fic & stories that feature the same dynamics help me.
There's a long history of marginalized groups using horror as a way to share their experiences. See The Yellow Wallpaper for an example. Sanitizing us denies us the right to 8/
There's a long history of marginalized groups using horror as a way to share their experiences. See The Yellow Wallpaper for an example. Sanitizing us denies us the right to 8/
share our pain & prevent us from having a safe space to confront & recover from our traumas.
If stories about/for/by MLM are ONLY about purity, it infantilizes us, treats us as inhuman, & denies us actual rep that allows us to grow as ppl. 9/
If stories about/for/by MLM are ONLY about purity, it infantilizes us, treats us as inhuman, & denies us actual rep that allows us to grow as ppl. 9/
A lot of these ppl who cry fetishizing, homophobia, & demand "healthy" rep are actually pushing their ship. Their ship isn't about ACTUAL MLM, but about them getting something they want.
As a multishipper, I've been accused of homophobia & fetishizing for my ships by antis. 10/
As a multishipper, I've been accused of homophobia & fetishizing for my ships by antis. 10/
A ship/story that MLM find ID w/in, isn't inherently fetishizing. It's certainly possible to fetishize it, but that is in HOW it is shipped. How ppl treat actual MLM.
MLM fans have been harassed for their ships, not seeing Destiel as canon, writing het, queer interpretations 11/
MLM fans have been harassed for their ships, not seeing Destiel as canon, writing het, queer interpretations 11/
When MLM share/write seeing Sam as MLM, some ppl dismiss it as harmful stereotypes. If we ship Destiel, we get ppl accusing us of the same. If we ship Destiel, but don't see it as canon, we are called homophobic & heteronormative.
Meanwhile, some of these ppl accusing us 12/
Meanwhile, some of these ppl accusing us 12/
use damaging stereotypes to support their own interpretations. They talk over MLM.
I've seen ppl use being the victim of sexualized abuse as an argument for sexuality & ship. I could write a whole essay about how INCREDIBLY damaging that is to men survivors. 13/
I've seen ppl use being the victim of sexualized abuse as an argument for sexuality & ship. I could write a whole essay about how INCREDIBLY damaging that is to men survivors. 13/
If you actually care about MLM & our rep, you don't call us homophobic for not seeing your ship in canon or interpreting a character as str8.
You don't insist a character outside your ship is str8 in canon (HC fine) when many MLM ID w/him & he's never stated his sexuality. 14/
You don't insist a character outside your ship is str8 in canon (HC fine) when many MLM ID w/him & he's never stated his sexuality. 14/
You allow us sexual expression & encourage stories about us. Yes, you point out stereotypes & problematic issues, but you elevate MLM voices to do so rather than talking over us.
That's VOICES, not one or few MLM w/ a shipping agenda. 15/
That's VOICES, not one or few MLM w/ a shipping agenda. 15/
You ask for a sensitivity read or, better yet, read blogs that point out issues w/how MLM are treated in fandom. You welcome MLM in fandom spaces & learn to tag appropriately.
You support MLM rep outside your ship & support diverse stories about queer ppl & relationships. 16/
You support MLM rep outside your ship & support diverse stories about queer ppl & relationships. 16/
Some MLM have written stories that have triggered & harmed me, probably bc they had different life experiences.
Many nonmen write stories that are beloved by MLM. Nonmen have written MLM stories that made me & others realize we are queer. 17/
Many nonmen write stories that are beloved by MLM. Nonmen have written MLM stories that made me & others realize we are queer. 17/
Nonmen write stories that help others see us as ppl; stories that help us uncover truths about ourselves, deal w/ painful pasts, or give us hope.
If we shut out nonmen MLM writers, we would have little content. 18/
If we shut out nonmen MLM writers, we would have little content. 18/
To say only marginalized groups can write marginalized groups makes us even more marginalized.
To say only MLM should write/consume MLM makes our gender & sexuality the most important thing about us. It denies our shared humanity. 19/
To say only MLM should write/consume MLM makes our gender & sexuality the most important thing about us. It denies our shared humanity. 19/
Ppl ID w/characters for reasons beyond sex & gender.
We make stories mostly about & for str8 men & you want to deny nonmen & queer men the ability to make/consume stories about OUR experiences when str8 men are paid write stories about us for themselves all the f-ing time??? 20/
We make stories mostly about & for str8 men & you want to deny nonmen & queer men the ability to make/consume stories about OUR experiences when str8 men are paid write stories about us for themselves all the f-ing time??? 20/
A lot of MLM written by nonmen is flawed, yes. Fandom needs to treat MLM better.
There's also beauty & stories that change for the better & even save us. Work w/us to make fandom better for us.
Listen to us. Don't use us as weapons for your ship wars.
21/21
There's also beauty & stories that change for the better & even save us. Work w/us to make fandom better for us.
Listen to us. Don't use us as weapons for your ship wars.
21/21
PS I also can’t help but notice that some of these Destiel shippers trashing ppl who read/write PWPs, esp from other ships, are supporting a Destiel AU that most MLM in this fandom dislike.
I'm NOT saying that the writer/readers are deliberately problematic.
I'm NOT saying that the writer/readers are deliberately problematic.
It's just proof that these ppl aren't listening to actual MLM outside of 1 or 2 w/ an agenda.
PWPs set in canon are way more likely to be about the actual characters than total AUs. So, if anything, ppl who trash PWP writers while supporting total AUs are doing the fetishizing.
PWPs set in canon are way more likely to be about the actual characters than total AUs. So, if anything, ppl who trash PWP writers while supporting total AUs are doing the fetishizing.
Someone just reminded me that the fic is heteronormative w/ a lot of stereotypes.
Heteronormativity is a perfectly fine thing to kink on & I'm definitely not condemning the writer or readers. You do you.
Just ironic this group is holding it up as the epitome of fic for MLM rep.
Heteronormativity is a perfectly fine thing to kink on & I'm definitely not condemning the writer or readers. You do you.
Just ironic this group is holding it up as the epitome of fic for MLM rep.
