wait i am...thinking https://twitter.com/kaspbee/status/1285086981181956097

like what if...like of course bill is a dumbass and would just be like "i cheated on you with my childhood friend bev" and then slips right into his Bill Schtick of like earnestness that you want to hate but you're still like "i guess i can't be mad when you're this dumb of ass"

but then audra meets the losers and it's not his childhood friend bev, it's Beverly Marsh, the woman who designed her Met Gala look two years ago

Beverly Marsh who she had several sexually charged coffee dates with while they designed a dress together

Beverly Marsh who, to her knowledge, just came out as bi and is in the middle of like arfully-messily divorcing her shitstain husband

and audra is just like "Beverly????" and bev is like "oh shit in the whirlwind of getting our memories back, i forgot bill was dumb of ass and wouldn't have told you that i'm me, obviously hey"

and then they go out :) and T*Z is like "Things Heating Up In The Marsh-Rogan Divorce? It's a Real He Said She Said" and bev and audra read it together in bed while holding hands and laughing about how bev leaked tom's nudes so everyone could see how small his dick was

and bev and audra are seen hand in hand at the courthouse after bev signed the divorce papers and T*Z gal pals them and they laugh about it while picking out curtains for their new apartment they live in together

and they never say anything about it, just get photographed together and people are like "oh they're such good friends!" and audra only wears Marsh designs to premieres and stuff and she and bev do that waist-arm-wrap thing on the red carpet that doesn't ruin the lines of clothes

and audra is the center of all of bev's campaigns and when asked directly bev is like "oh she's my muse" and they have sex on the floor of bev's studio after that headline, audra was a FAN

and then after a respectable amount of time, they're photographed at the courthouse hand in hand again in cooordinating white silk suits, but for some reason audra's ex husband is there? and so is richie tozier? and ben hanscom? and some no-names?

and the T*Z person is like "what fresh gal-pallery is this, ladies" and they're like "we're celebrating our wedding with our oldest friends :)" and then they go to like cabo or smth and ignore the news for a few weeks.

WAIT I HAD ANOTHER THOUGHT: when bev proposed, she posted an insta, no caption, like first person POV, her holding audra's hand up with the ring and audra's smiling face is like blurred in the background, and T*Z posts it with the headline "Marsh Jewelry Line Sneak Preview?"