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Hey! Hey you! I'm gonna share with you a BIG SECRET. Ready??? Listen close:
you don't have to respond to everything sometimes you can ignore stuff and be quiet
you don't have to respond to everything sometimes you can ignore stuff and be quiet
"but I want to make a JOKE about this thing you said!! A good joke!! it will be funny!! even if the thing you said isn't about being funny or anything, if I don't perform humor 24/7 I'll have failed in my Be Super Annoying goal!!"
"but this thing you said doesn't apply to me!! and I need you to KNOW it doesn't apply to me!! if I don't TELL you it doesn't apply to me, how will you KNOW???"
"but look I have something that's maybe vaguely semi a little related to what you said in a really abstract way and I need to tell you or else I will literally EXPLODE"
"but if I don't make a really awkward personal comment giving away too much information about myself because I assume a level of familiarity between us that actually doesn't exist I will TURN INTO A VOLCANO AND ERUPT"
"but I need to ADVISE YOU about this thing even though you didn't ask for advice and I'm not an expert on this topic and the advice I'm going to give you is very basic and obvious and you've heard it a thousand times, I NEED TO"
"but I believe MY right to redirect everything everyone says on the internet to be about me trumps YOUR right to exist!"
"but I don't understand something you said and instead of like taking five seconds to google it I'm going to ask you basic questions demanding you explain everything to me because you HAVE to"
