How to set strong boundaries when people think you are 'available' at all times (a thread):

1. Don’t feel obligated to read/respond to/answer calls and texts immediately in quarantine. If you need space, take it. In all ways possible. Check yourself though, if you’re in a spiral of darkness, and speaking to someone would help, pick up and reply.

2. If you find yourself in a convo that overwhelms you, exit gracefully (divert the conversation, or find a way to leave the room). Let the people you’re around know that a closed door means, ‘YOU SHALL NOT PASS.’

3. If you’re up for it, have a conversation with your roommates or family and create a ‘safe’ word or sentence you share when you get overwhelmed with an interaction. Mine: ‘Too much.’ Sometimes Mitch prompts it when he reads my physical cues, ‘too much,’ he asks. ‘Yes,’ I say.

4. Cancel or move plans. You don’t have to show up for every online social engagement or catch-up you’ve committed to. I realised last week that I am interacting with more people on a daily basis now, than I did on average before COVID. Clear out your calendar.

5. If you need to take a break from your house, head to the outdoor spaces you can occupy safely or to the music/movies/apps/books that give you reprieve. Remember, you do not have to stay (physically or mentally) when you are uncomfortable or overwhelmed.

6. If people around you are talking about the news too much, ask them to not update you. Let them know you’ll initiate a conversation about updates, etc… when you’re up for it.

7. As you learn to protect your mental space during this time know that YOU get to define your boundaries as you engage with others. Be kind with yourself and others as much as you can. We are all doing our best, and your energy must be protected in the ways you can right now.

8. Parents and those on your own, take what resonates from this. Yours is an experience I can’t speak directly to! If you’re up for it, leave some of your effective boundary setting techniques below.

This thread was inspired by Episode 27 of our show, Unpacking Self-Sabotage and Setting Boundaries. Listen now at: https://share.transistor.fm/s/dab10313