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my parents bag on my love life... all the time.
me: i want resistance bands...
dad: *sigh* you want resistance bands, an apple watch, airpods, AND a boyfriend? i’m not a miracle worker....
dad: *sigh* you want resistance bands, an apple watch, airpods, AND a boyfriend? i’m not a miracle worker....
me: Wait my cousin’s already 15?! man i feel old
dad: Just wait till your younger cousins start having kids, THEN you’ll feel older
mom: and you’ll still be single!
dad: Just wait till your younger cousins start having kids, THEN you’ll feel older
mom: and you’ll still be single!
ANOTHER FOR THE NIGHT
me: you should’ve heard them damian, they were making fun of my love life.
brother: you can’t make fun of something that doesn’t exist
i am feeling attacked
me: you should’ve heard them damian, they were making fun of my love life.
brother: you can’t make fun of something that doesn’t exist
i am feeling attacked
the saga continues
aunt: who’s gonna give you guys grandchildren first?
mom: probably damian
damian: yea kaila you’re gonna be forever single
aunt: who’s gonna give you guys grandchildren first?
mom: probably damian
damian: yea kaila you’re gonna be forever single
ANOTHER.
damian: isn’t there a donut shop here?
me: yes. donut ask me stupid questions like that.
damian:
me:
damian: boys donut like you.
damian: isn’t there a donut shop here?
me: yes. donut ask me stupid questions like that.
damian:
me:
damian: boys donut like you.
damian: don’t talk to me that way.
me: dumb hoe.
damian: i’d call you a hoe too but guys don’t like you so that’d be impossible
me: dumb hoe.
damian: i’d call you a hoe too but guys don’t like you so that’d be impossible
me: *sigh* i’m never gonna get married
mom: yea probably not
mom: yea probably not
my parents got me an apple watch for my bday & this is how the conversation went:
me: OMG THANK YOU IM SO EXCITED
dad: pls be careful with it, it’s not dispensible like your boyfriends.
will it ever end
me: OMG THANK YOU IM SO EXCITED
dad: pls be careful with it, it’s not dispensible like your boyfriends.
will it ever end
me: I want to go to a gay bar. maybe then i won’t get hit on by men.
mom: how is that different from now?
i’m gonna die alone
mom: how is that different from now?
i’m gonna die alone
not gonna lie i’m surprised i haven’t had anymore to add on to this lately
*talking about taxes*
my dad: you don’t have have dependents and you’re single. so you don’t get money taken from you.
me: *blank stare*
dad: haha! just like you. Single & Zero.
i thought i escaped this abuse
my dad: you don’t have have dependents and you’re single. so you don’t get money taken from you.
me: *blank stare*
dad: haha! just like you. Single & Zero.
i thought i escaped this abuse
my mom really sent me an instagram post that said “next relationship i get into imma need a $1500 security deposit” 
me to damian: you’re so rude. you’re never gonna get a girlfriend
damian: um okay. how many failed attempts with boys have you had? here let me start from the beginning.
rip me
damian: um okay. how many failed attempts with boys have you had? here let me start from the beginning.
rip me
*watching Jane the Virgin*
me: see? she’s like me she’s a little brown girl who likes white boys
mom: it doesn’t work out between them.... so yea i guess she is like you
me: see? she’s like me she’s a little brown girl who likes white boys
mom: it doesn’t work out between them.... so yea i guess she is like you
my uncle: ew! kai you probably farted bc you’re lactose intolerant!!!
me: NO IT WASNT ME i would have announced it! you know i don’t have a filter!
uncle: .....or a boyfriend
me: NO IT WASNT ME i would have announced it! you know i don’t have a filter!
uncle: .....or a boyfriend
bro i forgot about this thread.... aight ima start it back up
