#Attraction is an interesting thing. I wish I had known some of the things I'm going to share. Would have spared me time in #HeartBreakHotel

1. Not all #attraction is romantic attraction. I learnt this at a spiritual retreat in 2009. Dr Graeme Catto presented this topic.

The world has programmed us to believe that ALL attraction must lead to romance. This is not true.

Some people are meant to be just friends

Think of kids in a playground at a nursery school. At the beginning of a new term, all the kids play together. As the term progresses, kids start identifying "best friends" . The BFF changes every week but there are no hard feelings. Everyone is friendly and plays together

This is how I advise people to approach the dating scene. You need to meet as many people as you possibly can - in a group setting. Running club, ballet, yoga, art classes, biking - you need to meet a lot of different people in a neutral setting

If someone "catches" your eye, and the "catching" is mutual, you could spend time together. As FRIENDS! This is the nursery school "BFF" phase. Maybe you realise you're better off as just friends. You're able to go back to playing in the playground with no hard feelings

If during the "BFF" phase, you skip a few steps and don't bother interrogating the "attraction" and end up having sex ... Penthouse Suite #HeartbreakHotel

The #HeartbreakHotel DMs were sad. I could always tell where one person had changed the script to "relationship" and the other person was still at "friends with benefits"

Let's bring this closer to home. Twitter. There are some tweeps you adore and some you want to kill. The ones that you adore? Something has "attracted" you to them.

Does this "attraction" mean you must slide into the DMs? No

Look you could skip the steps and slide into the DMs.

You know where to find me.

I'll be waiting with Kleenex and bubbly

2. Thou shalt not change the script of the #attraction

So the attraction has gone beyond "BFF" phase. There's definitely a spark.

But there's a complication. There's a significant other or significant others.

If YOU decide to stay, then you must play nice

#EyesWideOpen

So many #HeartbreakHotel messages were cases of script changes that had happened without consultation.

"I thought we were ..."

"I assumed we were ..."

"I was waiting for ..."