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Over the years, I’ve increasingly found myself thinking about founder mental wellness. I’m glad we've started talking about it openly. This is a conversation we NEED to have. Being an entrepreneur is lonely. Sharing a few things that I wish someone told me when I started out.
1/ IDENTITY - You are NOT your startup. Don’t equate your identity solely with the company you are building. It’s a dangerous path. If your social media handle/images are an extension of company names/logos, you are already on that path. Course correct. Now.
2/ HABITS - Make this one big change. Leave your outcome-obsessed amateur self behind and become an input-driven professional. Amateurs have goals, professionals have habits. Focus on good habits rather than lofty goals. (Contd.)
It’ll help you stay centered when things are going outrageously well or insanely bad. Be patient with yourself about outcomes, but be rather impatient about inputs. Reaching the finish line may sometimes not be in your hands, but showing up at the start line always is.
3/ ROLE MODELS - Choose your idols wisely. There are many paths to success. Just because one founder slept in the office or gave up vacations for a decade or is abrasive with people in an attempt to be demanding, you don’t have to feel forced to do it. (Contd.)
Be careful about who you want to emulate. Unless you are willing to swap 100% of your life with someone, do not blindly copy them. If you knew what people gave up (willingly or otherwise) to be where they are, chances are you wouldn’t feel as strongly about being them.
4/ FITNESS - It’s difficult to have spiritual and mental energy without having physical energy. Invest in getting fit. Pick at least one activity you like. Something. Anything. If you can, lift weights. It’s magical. Whatever you pursue, do it religiously. (Contd.)
It'll do wonders for you - not just your body, but also your mind & soul. That bar won’t care if your traction is fading away or if your round is falling apart. That bar just wants to be lifted. Let it give you a sense of normalcy. Lift the bar. And in turn, it will lift you.
5/ SALARY - If you have raised capital or if your business can afford it, draw a reasonable salary. Obviously you are not looking to get rich on it. But it makes no sense to be worried every month about where the rent or the kids' tuition is coming from. (Contd.)
Draw enough to have the basics sorted. Your company needs 100% of your attention and you being comfortable day-to-day is crucial for that to happen. If you have good investors, they’ll probably stress this themselves. If not, insist on it regardless.
6/ FAMILY - Family is everything. Don’t just preach it. Practice it. When everything goes downhill, your family will stand by you. But don’t wait for that to happen to get close to them. Invest in your relationships - your partner, parents, siblings and your kids. (Contd.)
Kids, in particular, are magical. They will pull you out of the deepest abyss and they will shower you with attention and love. When you are with them, be present. You’ll never regret spending too much time with them.
7/ THERAPIST - Get a therapist. Think of it more like a coach than a doctor, and you will change your mind about whether you need one. Probably 90% of founders could do with a therapist. Maybe <5% of founders have one. (Contd.)
You're in a high stress role. You rarely speak freely with people because you are always selling - customers, employees, investors, media. You most likely need a therapist. Ask a friend to recommend one. And if it doesn’t fit at first, try another one. Keep at it. Get this right.
8/ MENTORS & PEERS - Invest in finding mentors. Find people in your network that you have chemistry with & ask them explicitly for mentorship. Cultivate a 2-way relationship - speak often, ask for advice, tell them what worked (or didn’t), know their passions, give back (Contd.)
Also build yourself a peer network in the ecosystem - folks who are in a similar co. stage as you. Find 2-3 people who you can be vulnerable with. You’ll find out you are not alone in how you feel. Getting your peer network right is almost as important as finding good mentors.
9/ VELOCITY - Direction is more important than speed. Don’t fall prey to hustle porn. Being busy may sometimes deter clarity & progress. You will make 4-5 crucial decisions in a year, and they need to be high quality. Everything else is just noise. Work like a lion, not a cow.
10/ ROOTS - Stay in touch with your roots. Visit your hometown. Talk to childhood friends. Don't lose sight of where you came from. It’ll help you remember that you have already come such a long way. It'll also help you realise that real world is outside your Twitter echo chamber
11/ GRATITUDE - Practice gratitude daily. You always wanted to be an entrepreneur and now you are. Very few people in the world get to do what they love. You are in a privileged spot. Be grateful. Verbalize the things you are thankful for. (Contd.)
Acknowledge the good things in your life, and you’ll see that not everything is as bad as it seems. Let gratitude fill up the space otherwise taken by insecurity, jealousy, regret and resentment. It’ll give you the happiness and optimism you need as fuel in the founder journey.
12/ BE KIND TO YOURSELF.
If you are struggling with this or need any help enabling any of the above for yourself, just reach out. Don't suffer in silence.
Entrepreneurship is key to unlocking the world's potential. And winning your internal battles is key to unlocking yours. Let's get this right.
Entrepreneurship is key to unlocking the world's potential. And winning your internal battles is key to unlocking yours. Let's get this right.
