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May is Borderline Personality Disorder awareness month, and for it I just wanna say I wish it wasn’t so stigmatized in society. When the average person thinks about BPD, they automatically think “crazy” and “unstable”, when that’s not true at all! (a thread:)
my friends can attest to it, I’m pretty chill and (hopefully) fun to be around, despite my BPD. BPD doesn’t make you “crazy”, it just means that you have a lot of difficulty seeing the gray area of things!! To me, life is either great or awful with no in between
Yes, I have episodes. Yeah, sometimes they’re bad enough to the point where I want to ruin everything about my own life or end it all in general. However, in the end I’m still me. The people that love me know how tell when I’m in an episode, and I often say stuff I don’t mean.
a BPD episode is kind of like a panic attack but with anger instead. However, contrary to popular belief, BPD episodes are often internalized, meaning first and foremost, I am mad at MYSELF.
many things can trigger an episode, even if it’s something small. Imagine being chained down to the bottom of an empty pool, then you blink and suddenly the pool is filled with water, high above your head. You’re still chained and drowning, so you panic. That’s an episode.
other symptoms include fear of abandonment, unclear self image (can manifest as dysmorphia), impulsive/self destructive behaviours, self harm, suicidal ideation, chronic emptiness, severe dissociation, ED’s, unstable relationships, severe anxiety, and of course, mood swings
BPD sucks. I hate it. But it’s manageable and there are a lot of coping mechanisms and treatment options, and I’m doing my best to feel better.
However, due to society’s unhealthy stigma, my psychiatrist won’t even put my BPD on my file out of fear that other medical professionals could treat me poorly, or like I’m not a real person. She is right to do so to protect me, but this needs to change.
I am not crazy. I will not hurt you. The worst I would do is maybe snap at you every once in a while, but it’s never on purpose. I try to isolate myself when I feel an episode coming on to avoid hurting others feelings. I am still a person, please treat me like one.
This thread isn’t nearly as detailed as it could be, there’s much much more I could go on about. BPD is a really complicated illness, but I think it’s very important for others to learn about and destigmatize. Pls do some research if you can! 
tldr; people with BPD are not scary or unlovable. I am engaged, I have an amazing group of online friends, and a best friend who’s been with me from the beginning. I wouldn’t trade them for the world, and I hope they feel the same about me. -Cas 
