Ok, let me enlighten everyone.

"Because of COVID" = "A change we wanted to make anyway for a long time but we knew we'd be asked for an explanation so we waited for a general-purpose excuse."

Examples: https://twitter.com/ZubyMusic/status/1391784621147410434
Kids need more breaks but football traditionally has two halves = because COVID

The grocery loses money 8-11 pm but cutting hours would upset people = because COVID

We have to print unlimited $ to keep boomers' index funds afloat despite stagnation = because COVID
When your desires are met through screens as opposed to in-person or via physical infrastructure these desires are more legible as data and more malleable to nudging and control. Those in power want you isolated in front of a screen but it's awkward to just say so = because COVID
Wow, this thread got dark quickly because of COVID
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