hanamaki asking the class what it's like to have a hot best friend and oikawa throwing his pencil down like he's DREADING answering this but has to... though the question wasn't actually for him

hanamaki: ALRIGHT SETTLE DOWN LMFAO. i got a question for you all. [eyes iwaizumi in particular] what's it LIKE to have a hot best friend?

iwa: a— [interrupted by the sound of clattering]

[the whole class turns to oikawa who is pinching his nose bridge]

oikawa: it's not easy—

[the class goes wild. everyone is screaming. oikawa just keeps going and hanamaki is trying to get everyone to settle down]

oikawa: i mean i get he doesn't even mean to be? but he's like the whole damn shebang and i just gotta sit here taking it all in with no one else to tell?

oikawa: so, that's kind of my experience. you don't really become immune to something that just keeps getting worse—

hanamaki: so you're saying—

oikawa: does anyone else relate to that? it's kind of difficult

half the class, in love with iwaizumi: [nodding sagely]

oikawa: and it's been since childhood. i know what he [jabs a thumb in iwaizumi's direction] looks like with drool all over his chin

iwa: hold the fu—

oikawa: and still somehow all those years don't override this? [gestures widely to iwaizumi, seated to his left]. seriously

yuito, seated at the back: i get what you mean. you've been strong all this time

iwa: what the fuck

souta: i admire your tenacity, oikawa. few would be able to endure it

oikawa: i know, right? what about you guys, though?

souta, shaking his head: nothing comparable

hanamaki: alright, back to the topic on hand.

hanamaki: iwaizumi?

oikawa, confused: why are you—was that question for him?!

matsukawa: i'm surprised you didn't think of that first

iwa: me too actually

oikawa: you're saying i'm hot

iwa: aren't you?

oikawa: not to you!

iwa: what do you mean, not to me?

oikawa, darkening: you...

hanamaki: alright EVERYBODY OUT

sayuri: i wanna see this though

hanamaki: no exceptions LET'S GO PEOPLE

iwa: don't tell me you're upset?

oikawa: i just feel like a fool somehow? this doesn't mean anything, right?

iwa:

iwa, looking away: of course not, anyone with two eyes can see you're attractive, oikawa

oikawa: [shakes his head] it's weird when you say it though, so if you don't mean anything by it just don't, i think

iwa: why?

iwa, loudly: WHY IS EVERYONE AT THE WINDOW?

oikawa, not minding: because if two best friends find each other hot isn't that kind of weird?

yuito, through the glass: oh my god!

iwa: no?

oikawa: i see

hanamaki: OH MY GOD.

oikawa, chuckling: don't say it anyway. i won't be able to handle it, i think

iwa: ...okay

[the next day, over the pa system]

iwa's voice: [crackle] is this thing on? yeah [laughter]

iwa's voice: OIKAWA TOORU

iwa's voice: i know you can hear this

oikawa, at a speaker: shut up shut up shut up SHUT UP SHUT UP

iwa's voice: the whole school knows you're hot so own it

freshman 1: is that iwaizumi-senpai?!

freshman 2: i heard he was out to prank oikawa-senpai over something, but i don't know if this is it

freshman 3, popping gum: you really think this is some prank

freshman 2: i mean he's just teasing

freshman 3, darkly: we don't know that

oikawa's voice: iwa-chan! stop that right now!

iwa's voice: ladies and gentlemen seijoh's hottie is here. can i get a round of applause? yes, thank you

oikawa's voice: what are you doing?!

iwa's voice: this is the pa system [gestures] and this is a public service announcement

oikawa's voice: let go of that button. now.

iwa's voice: i guess that'll be all folks [crackle]

oikawa: [throws his shoe] you idiot! i told you to stop that!

iwa: you need to get used to hearing it from me!

oikawa: no i don't??? STOP IT

iwa: no

oikawa: h-how did you say—

iwa: okay. how about if i said i actually did mean something by it?

oikawa: no you don't.

iwa: if i do? what'll you do then?

oikawa: that's not something i'll encounter. you don't

iwa, sighing: you sound so sure

oikawa: well maybe if this whole time i didn't... iwa—button.

iwa: shit, i'm sorry

oikawa, inhaling: they heard that

iwa: how much do you think they bet?

oikawa: what would they bet about?

iwa: maybe me confessing

oikawa: what?

iwa, shrugging: i like you, oikawa. i'm not just saying you're hot, though it's an objective—

oikawa: WHAT?

iwa: i like you?

oikawa: you're joking

iwa: no?

oikawa: oh my god

iwa: you're not giving me the reaction i hoped for...

oikawa: excuse me for not knowing how to act around you i think i've reached my threshold for that

oikawa: oh my god

oikawa: i've liked you too

seijoh's principal, tossing a cheque across his desk: tsk

his secretary: you underestimated those two

principal: i thought for sure they wouldn't break school rules

secretary: technically, it /was/ reckless, they didn't

principal: damn it

hanamaki, whisper-shouting outside the radio room: what are you all still doing here??? disperse! DISPERSE!!!

the door knob: [turning]

hanamaki: RUN. CLASSROOM, NOW. BETS. PAY UP

yuito: bout to be ¥¥¥ richer

souta: same bro

oikawa, sighing: are they gone?

iwa: i hope so