Mother’s Day is often more complex for many than we tend to consider. I thought to make a generic greeting for the holiday, but felt compelled to acknowledge our nuances.

For bereaved children who are painfully reminded of the absence of their mothers today, I see you. You do not owe us your manufactured joy today. We hold space for you to do what you need to in order to be ok.

To those who have mothered people they did not birth but adopted/fostered formally or informally through community, we thank you for standing in the gap to nurture us. Your motherhood is valid and invaluable.

For the estranged children of mothers whose presence in your life would be more harmful than good, we honor your choice to protect your peace.

No matter how your journey to parenthood came to be, thank you for choosing to be the loving kindness someone needs. You are appreciated today and always.

How could I forget the spiritual mothers? Godmothers who’ve committed their lives to being in the village for other children. Godmothers who help birth + initiate Iyawo (Santeria) & Awo (Ifa Isese). Thank you, your labor is not in vain.