Hey, so, fun thing happened to me this year. I had breast cancer.
Itās all gone, as are my (original) boobs, to be replaced by super-boobs, with enhanced powers.
I have dense, ābusy,ā cyst-y breasts, plus mom had breast cancer a decade ago (stage 0, if you have to have boob cancer, itās the one to get).
Because of this, I get 2 mammograms a year (fun!), plus a sonogram. Originally, they found a tumor, did a biopsy, it tested positive, stage 1. I was hoping for just a lumpectomy rather than a mastectomy.
Then I had an MRI, and they found 2 more suspicious masses, one in other boob!
I had a different kind of biopsy for those, which was deeply fucking painful. Anyway, more cancer!
All stage 0 or 1, VERY treatable. Since my boobs were obviously trying to kill me, I chose a double mastectomy.
I had the operation on April 13. Because the hospital is still full with Covid patients, this has been an OUTPATIENT procedure this whole year.
I was at my momās by 4 oāclock THAT DAY.
I was on the strong stuff for maybe three days. After that it was more discomfort than pain. And drains. Drains are the worst. 0/10 do not recommend.
Every day since is better than the day before. Iām moving fine now, driving, reaching for things. Just a little tough to reach the top cabinet in the kitchen.
Iām flat as a board for the moment, reconstruction is a process. Iāve got extenders in me right now, which they āfillā very slowly, one week at a time.
Once Iām at my desired size...
(Kidding)
They leave me alone for around 2 months and stretch my skin out. Then another surgery to replace the extenders with permanent implants.
And then ill reach my final form:
Iām 42, and though my mom had breast cancer, no other women in family have. This was... unexpected.
Oh, while Iām flat Iāve got these silly looking pillows to put in my bra. I giggled when they handed them to me, but they look perfect underneath clothes!
I know how incredibly lucky I am. Health insurance (Iām probably out a grand in co-pays), family to stay with while I recovered, friends who have been gifting me with food non-stop, and so much love and generosity.
One of my tumors was larger than expected, which made it stage 2. There was a possibility I would need chemo. I just found out yesterday that my tumor āscoredā low enough that I wonāt 




Iāve been holding my breath, when I got that call I finally exhaled.
I meet with an oncologist next week, I expect Iāll start a drug called tamoxifen next week. I hear itās... not fun. Still beats cancer though.
Anyway, breast-havers:
GET YOUR MAMMOGRAM


I didnāt put off any of my medical appointments during Covid- dermatologist, gynecologist, cardiologist, ophthalmologist, and good old primary.
I had three tumors: stage 0, 1, and 2. That werenāt detectable 6 months earlier! Imagine if I had procrastinated getting my mammo.
Why, yes, I did find out I had breast cancer while my cat was dying. February 2021: NOT MY FAVORITE MONTH.
If anyone else is going through this, or has a loved one going through this, and has questions, feel free to dm. Happy to share my experiences if it helps anyone

So many people have gone out their way to be kind. It really is overwhelming. And a reminder that maybe (?) the world isnāt a doomed garbage fire
