If I never mentioned it before, I will say it now: Guard Your Yes can’t protect you from life being overloaded when there are things that HAVE to be done.

For instance: I’m grieving. I’m helping mom with cancer stuff. I’m in charge of my grandmother’s stuff.

I am the only person from our family allowed in because: COVID. The facility is an hour from my house. I’m there every other day if every day isn’t possible. And then BGLK has to BGLK.

All of those things are automatically yes. There is no guarding.

How do we manage that?

Sometimes life becomes incredibly challenging and you deal with the challenge. You make great calls, some not so great calls. You rest as often as humanly possible. Cancel things. Ask people to understand if the hospital calls, you WILL be taking it.

We can prioritize happiness in our lives without assuming that times of unhappiness are an indicator that we need to adjust. I’m depressed right now. Look at that laundry list of shit I just told y’all I’m doing. OF COURSE I am.

Now imagine if I panicked over being unhappy.

Sometimes we get so caught up in mental health/self-care/positive thinking that we forget sometimes life hands us a shit sandwich and we gotta manage that biohazard while not tanking our lives. That sadness and frustration is a NORMAL part of this process. Some processes suck!

I cannot bubble bath and chocolate and meditate my brother back to life. We have been EXTREMELY MIRACULOUSLY fortunate in regards to my grandmother and mother’s health. I celebrate that. Just like in happy times our life has sadness mixed in, right now I’m in the opposite.

Some days I have an incredible day and sometimes I don’t get our of bed because I’m quite sure that I can’t go on. And does that mean I’m fucking up and not taking care of myself? NO! My life is rightfully depressing.

We self-care shame ourselves and switch up our mental health routines the moment we feel sadness because we’re terrified that it will go off the rails. But consider: sometimes depression is situational. Before panicking, make sure your situation does not in fact suck.

Tonight my mom came over and made cheesesteaks and we’re continuing the Drag Race marathon - it’s always my go-to comfort show

Lastly: our friend Sadness did NOT go through the hard work just for us to come out on the other side discounting sadness still.