When we know someone only through Zoom, have we ever really *met* them?

I want to think with you about digital presence and “meeting” someone online vs. “IRL.” +

Recently a CEO warned her workers that they may lose their jobs if they didn’t return to work at the office instead of working at home. She cites that the absence of “office culture” stifles relationships: https://www.niemanlab.org/2021/05/its-not-their-job-to-buy-you-cake/ +

One example the CEO uses is that she knew of a person who had been hired right at the start of the pandemic but was having trouble with his work. His managers didn’t know how to address it because they had never *met* him. +

But what does it mean to *meet*? Does it mean to hear the vibrations of someone’s voice? To touch them? Or does it mean simply for the molecules of my body to be in the same space as the molecules of theirs? +

I’ve had so many digital conversations and become friends with people during this pandemic with whom I have never occupied the same physical space. We have never breathed the same air. But I have met them. +

When I see some of them for the first time at a conference in the future I won’t say, “Nice to meet you.” I’ll say, “it’s good to see you!” +

Thinking about *meeting* someone only as occupying the same physical space also prioritises one particular type of human embodied experience. Zooming with someone still involves my body. I don’t lose it when I click “start meeting.” +

A narrow understanding of *meeting* has a particularly negative effect on people with disabilities. For example, Church services can often be inaccessible for so many reasons (physical access, overstimulation, etc.)...

but when congregants express a desire to keep digital options, it’s not viewed as “real” participation. +

I’m not saying that humans don’t need to be in the physical presence of other humans. But I do want to questions whether *meeting* someone should be reduced only to physical presence.

What do you think?