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Something I feel is really important to transitioning is having a healthy mentality about it. I played competitive Smash, and in that, I had to learn to forgive myself for my mistakes, focus on the wins, ignore the losses. (1/x)
In my transition, my mentality has always been, "I'll be happy for what I get, and not worry about what I don't", but also, "I'm going to put my best foot forward to get the best results."
This can be a tricky line to walk!
This can be a tricky line to walk!
You need to acknowledge what you're trying to improve and work on it, but only allow your victories to affect you emotionally, because that's what pushes you forward.
A lot of your transition is out of your control, and you need to make peace with that & still do your best.
A lot of your transition is out of your control, and you need to make peace with that & still do your best.
We all wish we had more time. We wish we knew that one regimen that produces the best results for us. We wish that access to hormones was easier, and our friends/families were more accepting. We wish we were blessed with genetic luck, or enough money for various surgeries.
Most of us won't pass. I didn't go into this expecting to pass.
If you go into every tournament hoping to win the whole thing, you're going to quit long before you stop going 0-2. You need to be happy you did a little better than last time and not worry about anything else.
If you go into every tournament hoping to win the whole thing, you're going to quit long before you stop going 0-2. You need to be happy you did a little better than last time and not worry about anything else.
Be happy for everything you get, and keep reminding yourself that it's not over yet. You might not pass, you might never pass, but you're going to make a lot of friends and you'll be attractive to the people who matter. It's more important to be happy.
Also be aware that the standard for passing is lower than you think. Your face might have masculine features (I know mine does) and still pass. There are a lot of cis women who wouldn't be considered passing.
Do what makes you happy. Focus on improvement, not results.
Do what makes you happy. Focus on improvement, not results.
Also don't let people drag you down with their ideas of what a trans person should(n't) be. Everything you do should be for you, not satisfying society or trying to look respectable. Be true to yourself, live with authenticity, unapologetically.
