I think I had a moment when I felt like my therapy was working. My son stood up to me. Like it was primal. I KNEW that this boy was trying me. It was like he had NO FEAR.

And I backed down to talk about it right then in there.

Now I know what your thinking. “My instinct would be to knock his ass out.”

I didn’t cuss. I didn’t beat his ass. I playfully got him out my seat so I still won the fight but my instinct was not to physically or verbally abuse my kid.

But my instinct was to get him to talk about how did he know he could stand up to me? He said I wasn’t the “typical black parent.”
He said I can talk to you about to stuff. Then I said, I’m not gonna lie. You hurt my feelings. Back in the day, they would’ve been disrespectful.

He was like. Oh. Well I wasn’t doing it to be disrespectful. I was doing it to be respectful of myself. It was in that moment, I KNOW THIS KID GOT THE FUCKING JUICE. He was standing up to me and he didn’t GIVE A FUCK who I was. HIS OWN FUCKING PARENT.

And I laughed with him about it. My heart has grown 4xs so big because he’s black, young, free, full of integrity, he has full autonomy of himself. If he can stand up to his own mama without fear of being hit or me cussing him out, I just broke a generational curse.

(And for the record, my son said he was scared that I would hit him but he wouldn’t back down).

I’m telling you our quarantine life has helped me to be better person and when I’m a better person these lil men over with me are flourishing too.

Now those of you thinking that has never happened to me. I’ve never stood up to my mama. Why? Or those who have stood up to your parent think about what happened right after? How did your parent react? How did you react in that moment?

That quick 3 seconds is years that can impact your fucking life. That tells you everything you need to know.