The mere existence of my 2 testicles cause quantum fluctuations across many different universes. My balls themselves are a paradox. It was never Schrödinger’s Cat, it was Schrödinger’s Balls. My balls both exist and don’t exist at the same time.

They're denser than that of a black hole and a neturon star combined; the gravity is so strong, light bends around my balls (your mom also bends). They do not contain sperm, they contain a dangerous material, "Strange Quarks,” formed during the big bang.

Because of that, my balls are considered the strongest material in the universe. If I were to connect my balls to a single generator connected to every electronic thing on our planet, they would be powered for three trillion years.