#BigSky, or, "these people make the dumbest decisions"

well, the receptionist knew way too much, so she had to die

aww "accessory" is a big word, shut up sheriff not as awesome as a dog

crunch fizzlebeef is mind melding with the netting-hat porcelain doll

can we confirm that the saran-mummy is steve? i mean in my head he is

so does methhead dipshit ROUTINELY drive straight through balsa wood motel room models?

"i got witnesses who say he was right here" you fuckin idiot

cheyenne can teleport y'all

let's go camping in the murder truck!!!

"we can have s'mores for breakfast" that sounds exactly like ronald the homicidal 8 year old's ideal day

i mean on the one hand it's fine for grampa QAnon to just weakly slap his sons, who are both idiots, i dislike all y'all, but...

"exactly what happened?"
"a mini michael bay movie!!! idk!!!!"

look idiots, you didn't drive a fuckin truck through a motel room, whatev, release that guilt, take that damn lavender bath, though i still don't totally trust the receptionist

hi, edgar allan poe calling, when the plastic swathed corpse half-stowed under the floor starts seeping blood, that's called a METAPHOR

"go explore. find some eagles' nests, idk! i have some blood to swab up!"

lol i mean of course this episode is brought to us by girl scout cookies
btw trefoils are great with peanut butter, but tagalongs are the GOAT

um, girl, they forgot to put your "i was in a motel room that got knocked into splinters by a fuckin hummer" makeup back on

"something was wrong. idk." now i want to look up how many eps this back end is gonna be cause this is like pulling teeth

NO MORE PILLS, HILLBILLY MORTICIA!

yeah now you wish you hadn't asked how blake died

cheyenne: "it's a funeral, but i need to make sure y'all know i got some boobs."

ummmmmm
so
either he replaced all the rat poison with splenda or...
he's the devil

"then you get knifed in the shower"
freud: hiiiiiiiii

"it's me! a guy wearing a black hat! can i more thoroughly convince you that i'm bad!"

okay so rand wants to play most dangerous game, but there's also meth
"all these good ideas come to me in the woods"
he's fuckin doin peyote or some shit

john wayne, seeing that his complete idiot methed-out brother is literally in an open grave and he's holding a shovel: well, it worked on the other brother...

i'm not sure if ANY member of this family is gonna be alive at the end of this arc

okay if i were about to bury my son i'd probably be sedated, she's way too composed

MURDERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
like
he got mobility issues
y'all prob got some hammers

i feel like this show is like 80% misogyny and then 5% women getting back at their abusive men

"i will kill you"
props, girl, props, she's takin marilee's correspondence course

"i can't tell you that"
oh my God i haaaaaaaate "i know but i won't tell you because we can't let the plot go too fast"

"it's a smart operation" o ho ho i doubt that

"super weird methy psycho killer" sweetie you got it nailed

so they're dumping environmental toxins on the back pasture and THAT'S the big reveal? i mean.

jerrie is in ACTION MODE and i am HERE FOR IT

ronald, clutching a plastic swathed corpse, hiding behind a tree
me: dumbest. serial killer. ever.

"margaret, would you like to say a few words?"
margaret: FUCK. ALL. Y'ALL.

this entire damn series has the feel of a fever dream, in that there is very little internal logic, and people don't behave like actual humans

"killing is normal! it's fine! this is not creepy! i am not creepy! it's fine!"

"she's 10."
so she already knows all about murder. so it's fine. idk.

ronald: ah shit i forgot the graham crackers but I DO have a corpse, so...???

ah shit i got a REAL bad feeling! jerrie please don't be a redshirt!!!

seriously blast hardcheese IS mulder, just with a mustache and a hall & oates crush

so, ronald's plan is to keep his girlfriend out of cell phone service range until... hopefully the detectives no longer are trying to find her for questioning? so a few weeks??? wtf, whatttttttt, this is not internally logical

ahh okay so the SKELETONS in the industrial waste are the real smoking gun
which, if this were mst3k, would already be morphing into horrible lumbering monsters

please please please oh i wanted her to have some matches in her hand, dammit

awwwww morticia cross-stitched her feelings

"i want to go to paris"
girl, you are my second favorite of this ep, i am here for your non sequiturs

ughhhhhh. like. "let's park a vehicle out by the skeleton toxic waste dump! it's fine! no one will see it!"
also rosie's dad is gonna die

i am firmly team "dead sister is reanimated by toxic waste and starts killing people"

two episodes left??? yeah let's fast forward y'all

this thread for @mariss_ugh 's future entertainment