Today whilst everyone else was voting, talking about a bunch of boats in the channel and loads of other stuff, trans people watched another attempt to have us banned from single sex spaces.

Here is a thread on what that actually means and what it does to trans people.

“Single sex spaces” means a great many spaces. But the one space I want to focus on is the one people literally cannot live without.

Toilets.

There is debate about refuges, changing rooms, some pond in north London... but people don’t tend to need them everyday.

And the U.K. media, this very government and many, many randoms online have argued to remove access to public toilets for trans people. This started as a drip feed in the form of media articles. It became very real last year.

Of course many argue that “trans women could use the men’s” or “well they should build trans toilets”...

Trans women can’t just use the men’s. Even the trans women who look trans. Especially the trans women who look trans. Because someone would be like “what are you doing here?”

Trans men can’t use the women’s. Have you seen your average trans guy on HRT? Half of them have beards!

Non binary people are just kind of fucked here. But arguing for a unisex toilet in this climate? You would get a kinder response dissing the nhs these days.

And do you really think every McDonald’s, bowling alley or gym would foot the cost of changing up their buildings? This idea is especially absurd.

If trans people were barred from single sex spaces, it would mean that they could not go more than an hour from their home

“I can’t come to your wedding, I don’t know where I’ll be able to pee”

“I can’t meet you at the pub.”

“I can’t work here anymore”

That’s the nightmare scenario for trans people. And it’s been dangled above our heads since April 2020.

I’ve spoken on this more times than I can count now. Most of you will be sick of hearing it, but since 2020 last year the U.K. trans community has lived with the threat of having our ability to live our lives totally gutted.

How do you live life away from home if you can’t piss?

The minister for women and equalities tried it last year and failed.

This year it was LGB Alliance co-founder Ann Sinnott who also failed.

But seeing the media, celebrities, friends, even some allies, entertain the idea that gutting your life is reasonable...it is horrible.

This is a stressor that does not get talked about. Living in fear of some person destroying your life and you being powerless to stop it.

Turning on the TV and seeing people argue for it.

Seeing court challenges that could win based on the disposition of one judge.

Before this it wasn’t exactly great. News media regularly saying the things you need to live your life are bad.

A writer you love advocating for destroying your life.

Seeing previously vocal political allies abandon you.

Seeing politicians rail against you in parliament..

This is what oppression is. We may have dodged a lot of bullets. But the fact that one of these threats being stopped feels like a massive win when in reality it has more in common with someone taking their boot off your neck?

And you may wonder why trans people sound so angry?

We will persevere and survive. We always have. The power of trans people is beyond question. We can survive almost anything.

But the scars that have been left after so long fearing for our ability to live our lives... they run deep.

But... we have to have a debate right?

If you are trans and reading this, reach out to your local trans group and get support from people who know what this has been like. If you are suffering, go to your GP, call a friend, and talk about it.

You can get better.

Cis people reading this, next time you see a debate about trans people’s access to single sex spaces, remember what is actually being discussed.

And think about how scared a trans person must be to have that as a constant source of background radiation.

(Everyone who says “yes but what about cis people being oppressed by the idea of a trans person in a space?” Is getting blocked. I never want to talk to someone like you ever again)