Everyone is talking abt the underwater kiss scene and how most artists forgot XL was crossdressing and I& #39;m scrolling the timeline like okay you caught me I can feel the shame actually I& #39;m gonna redraw those anyway but how can I make sure I get the right design for his clothes https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">

Ah just go make it clear I& #39;m not offended just laughing at myself cuz I& #39;m one of those who failed https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🙈" title="Nichts sehen-Affe" aria-label="Emoji: Nichts sehen-Affe"> however I do have this fear of being culturally inaccurate https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🙃" title="Auf den Kopf gestelltes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Auf den Kopf gestelltes Gesicht"> sometimes I feel like I have no place in this fandom and I& #39;m only comfortable if there& #39;s an official design to copy

And I really hate this feeling cuz my whole life I& #39;ve never felt like I belong and when I finally found something I& #39;ve really fallen in love with I still can& #39;t belong cuz I was born into a different place and I have to be really thoughtful of what I draw and how

Which I absolutely don& #39;t mind at all, I like design, research etc. But there& #39;s no time for EVERYTHING. And though I think I seem like a pretty chatty and easy-going person I& #39;m actually terrified of making mistakes in every aspect of this life and I also know that it& #39;s selfish

It& #39;s selfish to speak abt my own feelings but they& #39;re real as well and I want to make perfect art and sometimes it makes me cry that it& #39;s impossible cuz I& #39;m never gonna be able to fully understand this work of art of a different culture no matter how much I& #39;d like to

I& #39;m not even native in english lol
So yeah... I like TGCF so much I want to make the best art for it but I& #39;m just not enough and that should be fine xD
But just realized that the fact I& #39;m not really talking openly abt negative feelings anymore doesn& #39;t mean they disappeared

Hell and all of this came from a few awkard moments at work when the others didn& #39;t laugh at my shitty jokes lol
Made me remember that I& #39;m still that annoying, good for nothing airhead I& #39;ve always been https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😅" title="Lächelndes Gesicht mit offenem Mund und Angstschweiß" aria-label="Emoji: Lächelndes Gesicht mit offenem Mund und Angstschweiß">