Read on Twitter
I just want to go on record that when I talk about allo cishet people at the edges of queerness I& #39;m not talking about sex positions or who does the housework; it& #39;s that I& #39;ve met a lot of cishets whose experience w/ gender is way queerer than mine, & I& #39;m bi
and between my emphatic comfortable feminine-presenting cis bi womanhood and the way some of these allegedly less queer people talk about it I& #39;m not sure I really believe in the "being queer makes your gender experience automatically a little off the social mark" theory anymore
because I& #39;ve been trying to figure out for years where that vast gap is supposed to be between me and comfortably feminine presenting allocishet women when tbh it& #39;s more like "I& #39;m like that and I also like women" than an Entire Other Lens, as far as I can tell-
-but there is a *very* big gap between them and me and a LOT of self-identitied allocishet GNC women I& #39;ve met. And of course maybe not all of these people are actually going to end up allocishet women their whole lives, but they& #39;re clearly living at a greater social distance-
-from the cisheteronormative ideal than I for example am, and they do experience social aggression for it. I& #39;m not sure a "but they& #39;re still straight" does the lifting here it& #39;s supposed to.
And it& #39;s going to be an entire other lens for a lot of people in my position too, it& #39;s more... clearly universalizing this theory is gonna create some problems on both ends.
The fact that my experience with gender is very normative actually made me feel like I was insufficiently bi for years.
...several hours later it’s hitting me as I look back over this thread that “that gender discomfort you’re feeling is probably just your orientation, pay it no more mind” feels like terf nonsense to boot
