I thought I had a hard week but given my meltdown last evening I think I may have been a bit under pressure for some time now.
Pain has been a bitch the past two weeks and I got it into my mind that I'm gonna do the dance competition anyway and I planned several things..

.. in support of my friends and planned to use this 4 days weekend to clean the apartment thoroughly and wanted to practice more for my singing lessons and pick up instruments again and set a target word count for my wip and picked up programming lessons again..

.. all while working full time and, you know cooking and cleaning and all that. And I know there are people who juggle more but I think i have to admit I may have reached my limit. Last evening, after I didn't do well in one exercise, I came home and cried for..

..two hours while listening to coffeehouse music and drinking water (turns out I forgot to drink water properly the entire week) and today I went to my dance class after a day of running errands and cleaning the house AND I DID SO BAD and was so tired and I didn't enjoy it..

..AT ALL and I decided that if tomorrow I still can't do the dances, I am not doing to competition anymore and if I still can't get our of my head by my 7th theatre class I'll just give up because I am so tired you guys and I put so much pressure on me and that sucked..

.. all the joy out of things I love and I don't want to start hating them and after all the fact that I love something doesn't have to mean that I have to be good at it anyway, this thread will probably self destruct much like my meltdown tweets from yesterday..

.. but I needed to vent because I AM TIRED