I’m still cross about the Disabled man being allowed to use his Carers as pimps. Here’s the thing about being Disabled. Dating sucks. Some of us are lucky to have relationships with genuinely decent sorts, and the relationship survives. But for many of us, it doesn’t. This is sad

Disabled people are as likely to be intensely sexual, hilarious, intelligent, curious, kind, loyal, creative, or any of the things we look for in a partner. But lots of people can’t get over our physical differences, or impairments, or hack the social exclusion we face

It doesn’t really matter what the dealbreaker is: whatever it is, I’m here to say YOU HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO NOT ENTER, OR NOT CONTINUE, OR END YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH A DISABLED PERSON.
It’s ok to say “no” to anyone, for any reason, if you don’t want to be sexual or romantic.

The idea that we’re so repulsive, so unattractive, so lacking in the qualities that make us fun to be with, that a COURT has to agree that a Disabled can PAY someone to pretend to want a sexual or romantic relationship? That he will be satisfied with the poor facsimile? Rude.

How insulting it is to have such low expectations of us that a Court rules that a Disabled man can’t possibly be expected to find a willing partner, and build a relationship with her, resulting in having mutually consenting sexual contact? Rude.

If he has deficits in social understanding and communication, he needs to join a book group, or a wheelchair sports club, or become a knitter or storyteller. Possibly, he’ll need (legitimate!) support from carers to do that, or to process the new information. Like any of us do.

He won’t be any further towards a mutually satisfying relationship with a woman by getting artificial feedback that the social communication/flirting stage can be bypassed. It actually moves him *further away* from being able to develop a healthy adult relationship.