Subjectively rating noodle shapes from best to worst while fasting because i live a miserable anorexic life:

Coming in at number 1 we got TAGLIATELLE. Ppl say tht these r basically the same as fettucine but my mamas familys from northern italy and this is how dey make em, darker & slightly wider, can hold a sauce better too, plus the ones on ur right r even a vegan recipe. 10/10

Number 2 is PAPPARDELLE. U can tell already i like my babies wide. Perfect kind to accompany tomato sauce and more filling by the plate because of their size. 10 out of 10

You knew it was a matter of time until they came and here they are! Number 3 is PENNE RIGATE. Ngl i used to love putting my tongue through their hole as a kid, overall amazing aerodynamic shape and they r great made out of chickpea w butternut squash sauce. 9 out of 10

N°4 is a classic, CAPELLI D'ANGELO. Obviously makes me feel like a angel bc theyre so thin it could almost b a safe food, dainty and pretty and they bring me back to my childhood. Great for soup 10/10

Clap for number 5, an entirely biased opinion: FARFALLE! I used to beg mama to make them when i was a little girl, but she wld only cave in when i felt sad. these stupid butterfly bows wld me feel so cute for no reasion. 9/10 simply bc theyre better w cream but i'm vegan now

Delaying them any longer wldve been a culinary crime so here they are, 6th is FETTUCCINE. we all love them for they thickness but i dont have a core memory attached 2 them, and again. theyr at their best w cream, which i dont eat anymore. the jury settles for 8.5 out of 10

Number 7; LA MIAN or Hand-pulled noodles! This is an elaboration technique rather than just a shape, BUT what makes them so special is the Length they tend to have from this method they r prepared with. So fucking delicious i cant even tell u, 9 out of 10

We r currently at number 8 with RIGATONI! Awesome with tomato and basil, and if i was a better person i would have ranked them higher. 8.5 out of 10 bc anything that i cant wrap my fork around is a little less interesting yk

Number 9 was easy cos they r so much alike, except these r shorter and al forno every time (made in the oven, typically baked): ZITI. 7 out of 10 bc the point is for them to be cheesy as hell but tht grosses me out a lil now tbh

Made it to top 10 by an inch: FUSILLI LUNGHI which is basically thicker, longer fusilli. 7.5 out of 10, i havent had these enough times because they arent v popular but i appreciate them

11 is a champ w the cutest shape there is; CAMPANELLE. they r v nice i would say 10/10 because even tho they aint my favorites i jst like them yk as friends !! :)

12: CAVATAPPI, yummy w pesto but the hole is a lil annoying to me atp. Solid 8 out of 10 tho p good

Number 13 is not a shape but a variety: SOBA, made out of buckwheat hence the fact tht this is what theyre commonly called. i like them served cold + i love how they usually part of vegan menus. 7.5/10

14 is great but more often than not undercooked at the union, i will say 6 outta 10 or wtv im so hungry why am i subjecting myself to this i dont even like pasta that much hello

Finally at 15 this is purgatory! BUCATINI! or perciatelli! Whatever u wanna call them if u dont have an ed and can actually allow urself to eat pasta! thick and Good, 7 out of 10

7teen, named after the very well known ginger dude from Ratatouille: LINGUINE! Quite good but nothing special idk i aint invested in this anymore, 7 out of 10 try me at a better time bro

We r hungry in this house baby im not doing this anymore, 18th is DITALINI, p comforting & a lil cute, good for soup, we'll say 6 out of 10 too.

19 bc this thread makes no sense anymore: ROTELLE! Only getting a place in this ranking because theyre funny shaped. Jk these r good, my lil siblings loved them too. 6 out of 10 tho not v classy, u understand

20!! is ORECCHIETTE. these r pretty and make me feel kind of calm, i wld even let myself have them if i found a low cal alternative. 5.5 out of 10 for shits n giggles

21 before i kms; regular ol SPAGHETTI, a basic bitch but i grew up poor having these w nothing but oil, so they deserve a spot. 4 out of 10 but my abuelas sauteed vegetables made em worth it

Holding tight onto this thread bc i may just break otherwise, coming in at 22 we got VERMICELLI, great stir fried on Bún chả but they aint as tasty on they own. 5 out of 10, strongly considering a 6. Good job overall

ACINI DI PEPE ranked as 23rd but only bc i forgot about them wtf !! Absolute comfort food. SO PRECIOUS!!!! MUM, I LOVE U! 10 out of 10 idc idc

im running out of noodles call 911.. at a shameful 24th place come ELBOWS, i guess its what the gringos use for mac n cheese but dont quote me on this becuz I know jack shit abt yankee culture and i have no intention of learning♡! 4 out of 10 unless u r my ex. she made em nicely

CUT THE CAMERAS . DEADASS. It's the fasting brainfog bc i said Orecchiette when i meant RADIATORI!! ORECCHIETTE comes now at 25th bc it s unatisfying as fuck except u r a master vegan cook, 3 out of 10 lol

Oh man i rlly got almost no noodles left oh my what will i do w my life shld i jst start ranking pasta w filling,,, whats the point we all know dat it goes Sorrentino, Tortellini, then useless fucking shells my nanas ravioli barely even makes it to the ranking

ANYWAYS jus smile and now u guys coming in at dead last we got ROTINI, literally not worth the calories and only good in salads or w a shit ton of olive oil which i dont use anymore. 2.5 out of 10 they were my nemesis as a kid bc this meal pain meant we werent making ends meet

Negative fucking 0 is ORZO. why do u even exist. stupid fucking seed shaped excuse of a noodle stg. i'll just eat rice for that thank u next 1 out of 10

i have no noodles and no willpower left so im gna go light up a j b4 i mit