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This thread contains a cup of my tears -sorry, i mean, tea
when I look at my old pictures, I think, whoa, did I ever do that? Cool. Then i keep scrolling, swiping through the gallery. She used to be confident, excited to try new things, and... self-assured i guess/?
She lost it. Now this girl is nowhere to be seen. Since.. was it after the high school graduation? Or in the middle of college? What things has she gone through? She didn't have it in the first place, did she?
She always struggled with that issue. Why? I didn't know either. Perhaps our judgmental society? The stereotype? The beauty standart? Oh, i never be a big fan of society and the things that belong to it.
No, i don't live in the past. Rebuilding that self-confidence is extremely hard. Now that i think about it, when someone'd let me down, i always put the blame on me for not being good enough. They just walk away and move on. The impact? It hit me hard.
Over the last few years i hardly ever upload a selfie due to lack of confidence in myself for being said to not look like the real one.
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No. Screw it all. I'm beautiful. (Please God don't let me delete this tweet).
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No. Screw it all. I'm beautiful. (Please God don't let me delete this tweet).
That confidence issues still there though, but i appreciate this writing and mentally patted myself for being me even though i did nothing *patpat* : I thank you, for staying sane, for yourself, parents, and people that loves you.
Life's rough and that's okay. You've made it through many. The smallest thanks for yourself never hurt.
