Here’s a funny (?!) story for you. Funny now, not so much this morning.

Walking this morning I found myself suddenly physically in shock & pain on the pavement, unable to move. All I could see was a greyhound bolting down the street with a chair attached to it. Poof! Gone.

Apparently someone had tied their strong, Olympic speed running dog to a cafe chair. Which the dog then decided to bolt down the street with. It knocked me completely off my feet & I landed on my side, in shock, not knowing what happened. Other than seeing a dog whiz by.

I couldn’t get up. I was in shock and pain. Thought maybe I’d broken my elbow or knee. A paramedic turned up almost instantly. Coincidentally there was an ambulance right in front of me. Still in shock, I burst into tears & asked her to call my husband (I was 5mins from home).

People were running by shouting “stop the dog!!!” etc. The owner said “sorry” as he rushed by. Once I was up I sat in the ambulance for a bit whilst my husband came. He couldn’t believe I’d been... assaulted by a dog attached to a metal cafe chair. A dog. And a chair.

A man came up to the ambulance and asked if this was because of the dog cafe incident. The paramedic explained yes, it knocked this man (me) over. The man simply said “I’m looking for the chair!” the chair! Couldn’t give a shit about me. But the shitty cheap chair.

Today I was beaten up by a greyhound and a metal chair. You couldn’t make this shit up. I wonder where the dog went. At least I know someone was looking for the chair. I’m very bruised and sore.

The worst part is that 12 hours earlier I was knocked over by an absolute @&%#&1 on an electric scooter, ON A TRAIN PLATFORM.



I should probably stay home tomorrow.