girl please be a little more subtle

oh my godddd

i’m literally 4% in i can’t do this

like i knew it was blatant but.... this is BLATANT

she probably wore them to prom too

how many gifs of adam do we think she studied to get this right

she’s not like other girls!!

also i forgot to mention that her best friend’s husband is called allan aka adam’s character in what if

this is so painful

noah is the star actor in the duel of the fae trilogy and his character is named malec i can’t do this

you will never be moose

ok daisy ridley

this is identity theft

i guess she thought ripping off the mountain biking accident was a little too far?

we love technologically illiterate men

the juxtaposition of this vs her irl milking their meeting for over a year..,,

her tragic backstory

ok rian johnson stan!!!

the daiver agenda continues

she’s just ripping these descriptions straight out of reylo fic

it’s so different /s

omg she’s gonna be a seat filler at the oscars taking bets on whether they sit together again

what adam film is this ripping off do we think?

omg she signed a release form allowing herself to be films i guarantee they’ll be filmed sitting next to each other

whoever could this seat belong to?

“deeply, primally attractive”

he didn’t win best actor :/ rip

is this a verbatim adam quote??? it feels like one

akgroomer sweetie

his driver is named RAY

the irony of her constantly talking abt his stalkers i CANT

not really into the very 2000s misogyny

daiver mention # 3

it’s starting to feel like she just has it out for joaquin phoenix

burn this stage door vibes

so this pic is clearly going to go viral on twit

she said on her reddit acc that darcy is her dream AD role lmaoo

ben solo teas

there is... so much to unpack here

meant to be

omg guys adam stan twit made an appearance!!!

pic for reference <3

her debit card got stolen at the vanity fair after party so i think noah is going to pay her rent in his sugar daddy era

rhysand cosplay?????

she def has a cardboard cut out of adam in her bedroom

aitaf sweetie

i literally cannot deal with this irony

there’s no clyde logan in this universe rip

this is like. uncomfortably exploitative

i just sighed so loud

this is right after her 3 page traumatic backstory abt being a virgin whos never been kissed

*pretends to be shocked*

also that’s me just hit the 50% mark

i’m literally staring straight into the camera like i’m on the office

this is painful

the texts are formatted SO weirdly

there is literally nothing original about this guy

oh it got worse!!!!

girl he is not that hot

harry potter adults are a disease

please make it stop

so we’re ripping off tros too now

i am literally going to jump off a cliff!!!!

ok i was convinced this was going to be a reylo age gap but nvm

mom is a noah douglas anti :/

wait i forgot to attach the pic lmao

this is literally the dumbest most manufactured conflict i’ve ever read

they’ve kissed like two times

not quite dracula but okay

omg the emotional manipulation

not the restaurant name

blue butterfly cult strikes again

im learning way too much abt this woman’s sexual preferences in what is ostensibly a clean romance

ummmm

idk how to word this but like. i hate this whole subtle “look at what a good person i am” person thing she’s going for

sighhh

the way i’m reading this whole book and they’re not even going to fuck... i can’t decide if i’m annoyed or glad

actually nvm i do Not want to read her fantasy of what AD’s dick looks like

well you thanked them in the acknowledgements so...

he has moles and freckles of COURSE

oh my god that is not how people TALK

why did he say that about his dog

not juliets mum exposing her for being a stan

for context the whole conflict is that she pretended she didn’t know who he was when they met and he loves that she’s ~different and doesn’t fangirl over him like everyone else

the DRAMA of it all

the fact that she keeps talking abt knowing the difference between fantasy and reality is sooo funny girl this is a self insert fanfic

omg magnus has gone missing

please stop

(she found the dog dw)

so for his big romantic gesture he recreated their firs fleeting and this time she doesn’t lie to him

“with a mother and daughter” that’s literally her and her kid how did she self insert TWICE

the mormonism of it all

omg wait this is the end

i finished it a part of my soul has been taken and i don’t think i’m ever going to get it back

not to self promo <3 but if u want to read actual reylo fic and not weird gross self insert stuff my ao3 is here!! https://archiveofourown.org/users/newseptembers

and if you want to give me financial compensation this is my ko-fi lmao https://ko-fi.com/newseptembers