SOS

TW: Sexual harassment

An ex-student from a prominent Malaysian university has reached out to me with a complaint about sexual harassment. This will be a really long thread, please read.

In May 2016, Melur* was sexually harassed by a much older male lecturer, who was also the course coordinator.

a) During a consultation, he looked through her phone and asked if she had “any funny photos” of herself that she’d like to share with him.

When she took her phone back, he said “I thought you were my friend”
b) He stared at her breasts.
c) During classes, he repeatedly stated things like “I married my student!” and “Malaysians are not friendly, they always have this student and lecturer boundary”.

After this incident, Melur was nervous and scared. She told her boyfriend at the time, and he said “at least he didn’t touch you”. Many friends said the same.

Melur kept her distance from the lecturer after.

He then told the class that if they wanted to check their coursework marks, they had to go to his office. Melur didn’t want to. During finals, he singled Melur out and approached her table. He bent down and asked “do you know your coursework marks?”

Melur answered “yes” and he responded with “how? You didn’t come to my office?” Melur didn’t want to snitch on her friend who checked the grade for her, so she said “oh sorry, I don’t”. He gave her a smug smile and walked away.

Melur has always scored A’s and B’s for her classes, except for his, where she scored a C+. Melur feels that he lowered her grades on purpose. Melur was supposed to take another class with him in her third year.

Due to the trauma and fear, she begged her parents to send her off to the US for an exchange program. Upon returning, Melur and her friend had to get his signature for an exemption form. He was unhappy and asked technical questions on the spot just to “test and intimidate” them.

He asked them for their grades, which he announced to his entire class without their consent.

Melur first shared her experience on social media, hoping to reach out to students who have been in her position, and she did. She found many others who were preyed on by the same man.

That night, the university’s admin staff asked Melur to “take down her status”, especially from “external public view”. Melur refused, and the staff responded by saying “it will affect our job and student intake”. See images.

Melur reached out to her ethics lecturer, who prior to this had told the class that if they wanted to deal with a sexual harassment case, they could go to her. She said she’d call Melur back the next day, but there have been no updates.

Melur also reached out to the uni counsellor. The counsellor said that social media is “not the right way to go about it”. She told Melur to report her complaint on a portal for uni students or the public to ask questions, requests or any problems, which Melur did.

After filing the report, Melur received a call at 3am. She felt uncomfortable because she thought it was the perpetrator. She didn’t answer. Instead, she texted the counsellor as they were already in touch. According to her, that number belonged to the security department.

Melur told her that she didn’t like that they called her at that hour. The next morning, the counsellor defended the security department because they “take this seriously”.

She went on to say that “social media isn’t a good way”, that “reputation is very difficult to build. There are some very good lecturers in [redacted] that I know you know”, implying that Melur needed to think about them, their reputation and the school’s name.

The counsellor proceeded to say “maybe once you are at my age, you will understand”, and then said “I think I should end the call because I’m getting freaked out by you,” when Melur stood up for herself by saying “now I feel like you’re invalidating me cause I’m young”.

Security closed her case and replied to her complaint, asking her to go down to the office to take her statement. Melur told the officer that she is in a different state and he responded with “then how?” Bear in mind that this man is the primary investigator of this case.