Did you know that if someone wrote a thread about a specific identity, it’s actually fucking exhausting when half the replies are people *without that identity* derailing to make it about themselves?

Make your own thread.
Honestly. Why do people think it is helpful to pop up to say “oh it’s the same for X identity as it is for Y identity” when they even can’t know because *they’ve never experienced being Y* & they’re missing a lot of nuance & context & lack the experience necessary to assert that
You don’t need to derail conversations other marginalized people are having to make it about you. You can write your own thread or scroll or search to find one someone else wrote.
It’s one thing if you carry both identities and there’s ways they intersect that aren’t being discussed. That’s different. I’m specifically talking about making every convo about you even if it’s not about you. I’m begging people to stop doing this. Listening to us is free.
“You could replace [identity] with anything and—“

Honestly 95% of the time someone makes these derailing comparisons to me, they don’t actually line up at ALL with what I was talking about because they *literally don’t understand my experience of that identity because they’ve literally never had it*
Perhaps have discussions with your friends in DMs or something instead of trying to speak over people’s experiences publicly in *every thread*, if you feel you really need an outlet to discuss your thoughts. Or write your own thread!
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