I didn’t come to twitter to be a “big” account. I came to twitter because I lost everyone. The act of transition can be a destructive one in a lot of ways, albeit a necessary sort that quickly pivots to rebuilding.

Twitter was my rebuilding.

1/whatever

I was divorced, living alone for the first time in 14 years, and freshly on hormones. So when I say things were chaotic, believe me, they were indeed. My ex’s family was inaccessible after the separation. My own was inaccessible due to me living my truth

My mom was dead. Dad might as well have been (might even be - I have no idea). I had a lot of friends say they’d stick through it. But then calls stopped being returned.

I was, in every conceivable way, on my own

I had been on Facebook for a bit when a couple of people suggested I give the bird app a go. I had never used it before. Seemed like just a bunch of noise and nonsense (which it is).

But... I wanted to be seen. I craved interaction. So, I signed up.

When I first arrived I used a cartoon pfp. Didn’t go by Miss Gender. Had no idea what the fuck a quote tweet was. But slowly and surely I acclimated. Learned the ropes. Began to comment.

And I’m doing so, I found out I was kind of good at it.

ADHD meant my brain never stopped. An English degree and lifelong love for making people laugh meant I could focus it. So I did. And I started to gain mutuals. @_gemini_feed is one of the first first total strangers I found myself friendly with. Her circle allowed me to meet more

At some point a stumbled across a girl who went by Black Rose. Maybe you’ve heard of her.

After awhile the cartoon pfp was dropped. I started to show my face. Started to speak on video. I would have done none of these things without the kindness and support of others, including of course @angel_0f_deathx

She dmd me first btw

When I saw it in my inbox I thought she made a mistake at first lmfaooooo

Over time I found my voice. And more and more I found that voice being used to talk about trans issues, about my community - the first I had ever truly been a part of

I slowly realized that the chaos of my early days of transition had left me in a unique position: I wasn’t scared of being known. I wasn’t scared of being seen. I wasn’t closeted. I had a stable job that I eventually was able to come out and be accepted at

I started to realize that I kind of had nothing to lose. And for a community of people that are so often threatened with losing everything, that was a *privilege.*

So I took that privilege, and combined with my knack for being loud and annoying, started to fight

My combative nature gained me more visibility. But perhaps most surprising and humbling, it gave me purpose. I began to receive messages from other trans people thanking me. Some asked for advice, and I did what I could amidst my own confusing journey

As time went on, this became my purpose. Not just to be silly, not just to be seen. My purpose was to show people that trans can punch back. And punch back I did. Over and over. Relentlessly. I built up an armory of traits for social media warfare

But though that newfound aggression, I learned harder lessons. People threatened to hurt me for it. One even threatened to drive to my house and shoot me

I trusted the wrong people at times.

I became a problem for the community at times

But these events were not forgotten. All of them have been metabolized and applied. My mistakes informed my perspective as much as my victories.

After one particularly ugly error in tact, I sobered the fuck up about my responsibilities.

See, I’ll see cis people say shit like “follower counts don’t matter” or “who cares if you’re internet popular”

Y’all need to understand we don’t often get these platforms. We rarely get opportunities to be aggressively undeniable.

And that I most certainly am

10k is cool just at face value, but it’s *important* to my community.

I can guarantee if you are cis and follow me, I’ve spoken on shit you would have otherwise never even known about. Not just our struggles, but our culture. Our beauty. Our comedy.

I’ve also helped fund transitions. Help people pay bills. I’ve walked people through cracking their egg in DMs. I’ve raised awareness. I’ve tangled with politicians and celebrities. I’ve burned the accounts of bigots to the ground

This is what a platform of this size affords me. And I am VERY aware of the value of that

The trans community is so often victimized, so I made a symbol for us to rally around. Something that shows we aren’t afraid to punch back

Pride Fighter isn’t just graphic design; it’s my personal philosophy as a visualized concept

I have tried to do good here, but I would be remiss if I didn’t acknowledge my failings. My anger has blinded me at times. I have inflicted unnecessary damage

I am not a perfect person

But I am an honest one. Even about my mistakes.

I like to think I’ve gotten better

I hope I have

Y’all deserve that anyway

I’ve made a family there. I’ve found the love of my life. I’ve sold art, and I’ve fought the good fight as best I can. And I will continue to do so

Because I am your chaos aunt, and you all are my bbs

So let’s keep at it, and keep fuckin’ raging

/end