You know what’s frustrating for me as a doctor - it is not that people are dying due to a disease, we know people can die to diseases. We accept that.

What makes us helpless is that right now people are not dying to disease; they are dying due to lack of treatment & logistics

We are trained to treat, we are unable to do that.

It is okay to reconcile with death when you have tried your best.

But when you watch people in 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s die waiting for treatment, due to lack of medicines or oxygen — you know they could have been saved.

So many colleagues I know are sitting with phones on DND mode because they don’t know what to say.

We can say sorry we tried our best but your patient died due to a massive heart attack.

But what can I say to a 28 yr old with 2 month old kid who can’t find bed for her husband?

For the first time in my entire medical career, I am afraid of consulting, of talking to patients in relation to a disease or going to a hospital because I know that I won’t be able to offer them much in terms of treatment.
What is the point of writing RTPCR if it can’t be done?

What is the point of writing urgent admission to ICU when you know even if you try tooth & nail you can’t help them get a bed.

We are helpless because we can’t even try to save a life.

The helplessness of watching people die is devastating.

helplessness of staring into eyes full of tears begging us to do something is exhausting.

helplessness of watching relatives run around to try & get a bed is frustrating.

At some point their grief is now becoming ours too