MUTUAL communication can go such a long way. Where both parties vent. Both parties feel heard. Both parties feel listened to. And both parties feel seen. Not just always the focus being on solving one person’s pain & problems and the other person’s being silenced and dismissed.
I understand this takes a different level of maturity with communication. To also be able to care about someone else’s feelings other then your own while you’re hurting. But always remember... ALL parties deserve to be heard out, Loved on and heal. MUTUAL communication is key.
If things ONLY change when one person reaches a breaking point but the other partner has been saying for a while that they had been feeling the exact same way and nothing was done about it when it was them mentioning all of these same exact things, things aren’t mutual.
This can cause a disconnect in understanding, communication and effort because of course you’re typically going to think... “I’ve been feeling this way and you ignored my pain and now since you’re hurting too that’s the only reason we’re making changes”? Which can feel unfair.
Now you’ve spent so much time silencing your own pain and things you were vocalizing that were weighing on you that completely got dismissed but you’re expected to put in effort to fix the SAME problems that were hurting YOU prior to this point? So, what do you do? I’ll tell you.
Try expressing to you partner, “hey, I’m sorry for what you’re experiencing because these are the same things I’ve been mentioning to you that I felt too. Do you think that we can BOTH find some healing and Love on each other?” This provides & creates a safe space for you BOTH.
Often times one person feels neglected or silenced by the other person because they may have communicated the same exact pains prior before the other partner and those feelings were dismissed and ran by. Now I bet you’re wondering... how can you do what wasn’t even done for you?
Communication won’t always be easy, but it should ALWAYS feel mutual. Try expressing, “I care about you and this connection, but I’ve experienced these same things as well as communicated them to you and I don’t know how to fix something that wasn’t fixed for me.” Honesty is key.
It’s hard not knowing how to stop someone from hurting & feeling pain by you because you can only mirror back what you’ve seen & experienced from THEM. But if both parties aren’t to a point where they can add visibility to EACH OTHER instead of always just one, it’ll be tough.
All it takes is to be listened to the same way you want to be listened to. To be held the same way you want to be held. To be heard out for all you’ve experienced and been through the same way you hear others out for what they’ve caused you. All it takes is reciprocation.
Thanks for coming to my TED TALK. https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="♥️" title="Herz" aria-label="Emoji: Herz"> I hope I helped some people reach a resolution together.

If this resonates, you are always welcome to show love to my TipJars listed belowhttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🕊" title="Friedens-Taube" aria-label="Emoji: Friedens-Taube">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🤍" title="Weißes Herz" aria-label="Emoji: Weißes Herz">
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