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How to finger yourself: a 18+ thread for ppl with vaginas
Hi! I just wanted to start by saying that im not an expert. Im going by my own personal experiences.
Sex education in general sucks but it also doesn& #39;t help that ppl with vaginas are expected to stay pure for self worth. You are allowed to do what you want with your body. You& #39;re allowed to feel good too of thats what you want.
If you dont know where your vagina is, its at the very bottom of your vulva. It looks different for everyone. It might not even look like a hole and thats fine. Use a mirror or your phone camera when youre first discovering yourself.
Its best to do this when you are aroused as it will make your vagina expand and produce lubrication. Not everyone produces a lot of lubrication and thats okay. You can use lube but please dont use household products unless you research and know for sure its 100% safe.
Personally for myself I find i am more aroused when I am talking to or with someone else. If you need to watch porn or listen to audios thats okay too. There& #39;s nothing wrong with that and watching or listening to porn should not impact your ability to orgasm without it.
Also keep in mind that with masturbation, orgasm shouldn& #39;t be the goal. The goal is to have fun. Most ppl can& #39;t orgasm with just vaginal penitration alone. Not everyone can squirt. Most porn is fake and sensationalized and misrepresents people with vaginas.
Also! Fingering differs based on the time of month, especially if you menstruate. For me, around a week to two weeks after menstruation it is very easy to get aroused, or wet. My sex drive is higher then and its easier to finger myself.
I find that around a week or two weeks before I menstruate, I am less aroused, and if I do finger myself I can hit my cervix. If you are gentle it probably won& #39;t hurt and it might even feel good. If you finger yourself and feel a big bump, its your cervix.
Ok, sorry for all that extra information, but I thought it was important. If you want to finger yourself for the first few times, make sure you are relaxed. Get a mirror so you can see what you are doing. For me, laying on my back with my legs open is best but do what is best for
You. This is assuming you are aroused and/or you have used lube. For now, try one finger. Go to the bottom of your vulva. Your vagina will be just above where the vulva ends.
It probably won& #39;t look like how the chart looks which is fine. Try slowly going in with just one finger. The middle finger might be the easiest. It might be uncomfortable but if you are wet it will be fine. Don& #39;t go fast for your first time.
Try not to stress about finding your g spot. When your finger is in your vagina, try pressing it against the top of your vagina, if that makes sense. Thats where a lot of the more sensitive places are.
Try putting pressure or curling your fingers slightly up to the top of your vagina canal. Maybe move in and out if that feels nice. There& #39;s no right way to do it. Idk if this is a universal experience but your finger will not get stuck. Dw about that.
For the first few times it might not feel like a lot and thats okay. It took me a couple years to be able to get to where I am now. In general its best to try to not compare yourself to others. All bodies are different.
Eventually you may be able to move up to using more fingers or using a toy. The best thing is to not rush yourself bc trust me,, it will hurt if you do. Be gentle with yourself!!! If youre gentle it& #39;ll feel uncomfortable at worst which is normal!
You might feel like you have to pee. That is probably because you are pressing on your g spot, which is right beside your bladder. You most likely will not pee or squirt,,, since thats what the liquid would be, but maybe laying on a towel may make you feel more at ease.
Like I mentioned before, most ppl with vaginas cannot orgasm with only vagina stimulation. Take turns with fingerings and touching your clit. I find that edging myself with my clit and then switching to fingering feels amazing.
You can also try fingering yourself and touching your clit at the same time. Imo that also feels amazing and it can lead to amazing clitoral orgasms. You can even have a vaginal and clitoral one at the same time.
When you are close to having a vaginal orgasm, you will feel more and more like you have to pee. Thats why its nice to have a towel just incase. When you feel that way, start going faster or putting more pressure on where you are touching.
I find that its hard to orgasm vaginally because I have chronic back pain and my arms get tired. Thats okay! The most important part is to feel good, not to orgasm. Also, toys exist and can be helpful for people with disabilities and limited mobility.
Ill conclude this thread now, but feel free to add to it and ask me questions. I hope I could be helpful :)
