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"So, what else do you do besides stalk people and tell lame jokes?"
Dazai chokes on his coffee, the liquid burning the back of his throat at the unexpected question. One second, he was happily ogling the man across from him, only half paying attention since his brain couldnât+
Dazai chokes on his coffee, the liquid burning the back of his throat at the unexpected question. One second, he was happily ogling the man across from him, only half paying attention since his brain couldnât+
decide between sincerely listening or admiring every little curvature of Chuuyaâs being. Itâs the first time heâs ever had the chance to see him up close, his past attempts all having been executed from a distance, either by peeking around darkened corners or through his doorâs+
peephole-
Yeah, okay. /Maybe/ Chuuya's question isn't without a solid basis for inquiry.
"I d-didn't-" Dazai inwardly curses his voice for cracking at such a crucial moment and clears his throat as a tickle of warmth creeps up on him.
"I wouldn't call it /stalking./"+
Yeah, okay. /Maybe/ Chuuya's question isn't without a solid basis for inquiry.
"I d-didn't-" Dazai inwardly curses his voice for cracking at such a crucial moment and clears his throat as a tickle of warmth creeps up on him.
"I wouldn't call it /stalking./"+
And just the way Chuuya raises an eyebrow, lips quirking up in a stupidly attractive smirk, tells Dazai that bullshitting his way from the matter is the equivalent of digging himself into a deeper hole.
Case in point-
âIâve seen you waiting around in the lobby for me,+
Case in point-
âIâve seen you waiting around in the lobby for me,+
pretending to have a lively conversation on the phone but ending it as soon as I walk by to catch the same elevator.â
âThatâs not-â
âYou also do laundry at the same exact time as me, even though I donât have a schedule for that.â
âWell-â+
âThatâs not-â
âYou also do laundry at the same exact time as me, even though I donât have a schedule for that.â
âWell-â+
"/And/-"
Dazai can /feel/ it, can feel the finishing blow long before it strikes, and the worst part is, he doesn't even know which of his admittedly shameful acts the redhead has caught him doing. Can anyone blame him for sweating literal buckets right now?+
Dazai can /feel/ it, can feel the finishing blow long before it strikes, and the worst part is, he doesn't even know which of his admittedly shameful acts the redhead has caught him doing. Can anyone blame him for sweating literal buckets right now?+
Actually, scratch that. The only person he can blame is himself.
"-I've had /many/ concerned neighbors advise me to report you, because allegedly, someone caught you sniffing the clothes from my laundry basket."
Dazai takes a strangled breath, his pride withering in the+
"-I've had /many/ concerned neighbors advise me to report you, because allegedly, someone caught you sniffing the clothes from my laundry basket."
Dazai takes a strangled breath, his pride withering in the+
deepest, darkest crevices of his mind.
Chuuya, having said what needed to be said, picks up his coffee cup and takes long drink, generously giving the brunet a chance to explain himself as he watches him over the brim of the cup, beautiful blue eyes gleaming with amusement.+
Chuuya, having said what needed to be said, picks up his coffee cup and takes long drink, generously giving the brunet a chance to explain himself as he watches him over the brim of the cup, beautiful blue eyes gleaming with amusement.+
Dazai appreciates it, he really does. Alas, he has nothing but a poor, transparent lie of, "You have...nice-smelling detergent...?"
"My /dirty/ clothes, Dazai. You were caught sticking your nose in my unwashed, detergent-free clothes."+
"My /dirty/ clothes, Dazai. You were caught sticking your nose in my unwashed, detergent-free clothes."+
So, /anyways/, Dazai's plan tonight now consists of packing his bags and moving across the world. Totally not because his pretty neighbor just outed him for the pervert he is and led him to believe that he may not have had a chance in the first place.
Nope. Not at all.+
Nope. Not at all.+
But before he goes and says goodbye to his life here, can he just-
"I really like you."
And Dazai's voice is so embarrassingly /quiet/ amidst the hustle and bustle of the café they're in, he's surprised Chuuya hears him at all.
"I can tell," the redhead replies,+
"I really like you."
And Dazai's voice is so embarrassingly /quiet/ amidst the hustle and bustle of the café they're in, he's surprised Chuuya hears him at all.
"I can tell," the redhead replies,+
leaning forward with his elbows resting on the table.
"If I'm being honest," Chuuya places his chin on a fist, head tilting to the side ever so slightly, "you're /very/ lucky that our landowner has your back, otherwise, I would've already called the cops."+
"If I'm being honest," Chuuya places his chin on a fist, head tilting to the side ever so slightly, "you're /very/ lucky that our landowner has your back, otherwise, I would've already called the cops."+
Dazai's blood /should/ be running cold at the insinuation of charges against his name, and he /should/ be on the ground, bowing so low, his forehead touches the floor.
Instead, his blood runs searing /hot/ as he watches, entranced, as Chuuya slowly dances a hand to his side of+
Instead, his blood runs searing /hot/ as he watches, entranced, as Chuuya slowly dances a hand to his side of+
the table, curls his fingers around the dainty handle of his coffee cup, and makes it a point to drink from where Dazai's lips once were. The brunet's throat goes dry when the other man gives a tantalizing lick to the surface before returning it to him with a too bright smile.+
"I'm not into perverts, but I am very much into /you./"
Oh.
/Oh./
Would you look at that? Dazai's brain is short-circuiting, causing an inhuman sound to come out of his mouth, which he can't even begin to be ashamed of, because-
Chuuya likes him?
It's not unrequited?+
Oh.
/Oh./
Would you look at that? Dazai's brain is short-circuiting, causing an inhuman sound to come out of his mouth, which he can't even begin to be ashamed of, because-
Chuuya likes him?
It's not unrequited?+
He's /not/ going to prison for essentially violating someone's personal space?
New evening plan: preparing what he'll wear to their wedding.
Dazai's thinking a winter wedding, but if Chuuya wants a different season, then-
"Who are you? Why are you with Dazai-sensei?"+
New evening plan: preparing what he'll wear to their wedding.
Dazai's thinking a winter wedding, but if Chuuya wants a different season, then-
"Who are you? Why are you with Dazai-sensei?"+
While Dazai's delusional image of walking down the aisle is shattered, both men turn their heads to see a little boy beside their table, a black demon-like plushie in hand and frowning right up at Chuuya.
"Sensei, is he bothering you?" he asks and waddles his way to his side.+
"Sensei, is he bothering you?" he asks and waddles his way to his side.+
"Your face is red."
Before the confused Dazai can dismiss the boy's worries, another more frantic voice is cutting in, calling the little one's name from the direction of the entrance.
"Ryuu! What are you doing? I told you not to bother sensei."+
Before the confused Dazai can dismiss the boy's worries, another more frantic voice is cutting in, calling the little one's name from the direction of the entrance.
"Ryuu! What are you doing? I told you not to bother sensei."+
"I'm not," the boy says with a pout. Then, he's pointing his finger at a bemused Chuuya. "He is."
Thus proceeds a minor scolding about pointing from the man Dazai knows all too well as his best friend and the father of his beloved student
"I'm so sorry, Dazai.+
Thus proceeds a minor scolding about pointing from the man Dazai knows all too well as his best friend and the father of his beloved student
"I'm so sorry, Dazai.+
I tried too hide you from his field of vision when we passed by, but his senses are shockingly sharp when it comes to you."
At that, Dazai simply waves the apology off, fully understanding that Ryuunosuke's fascination with him is nothing to scoff at. If anything, it's scary.+
At that, Dazai simply waves the apology off, fully understanding that Ryuunosuke's fascination with him is nothing to scoff at. If anything, it's scary.+
"Odasaku, this is Chuuya," Dazai introduces after the belated realization that the redhead across from him has no clue what's going on. "Chuuya, Odasaku."
As per proper etiquette, the two exchange greetings along with friendly smiles.
Meanwhile, Ryuunosuke takes the initiative+
As per proper etiquette, the two exchange greetings along with friendly smiles.
Meanwhile, Ryuunosuke takes the initiative+
of bestowing the safety of his precious toy to Dazai, so that he can go back to glaring at Chuuya from behind his dad's legs.
Having noticed the rather intense stare, the target of the little one's hostility shifts his attention to him, wearing his friendliest smile.+
Having noticed the rather intense stare, the target of the little one's hostility shifts his attention to him, wearing his friendliest smile.+
"Hello. My name is Chuuya." He leans down to peer at the boy, even giving a little wave. "And you are?"
Despite having his concerns, Ryuunosuke is well-mannered young boy, as taught by his father, and reveals part of his face to mumble his own greeting.
"Oda Ryuunosuke..."+
Despite having his concerns, Ryuunosuke is well-mannered young boy, as taught by his father, and reveals part of his face to mumble his own greeting.
"Oda Ryuunosuke..."+
"Nice to meet, you Ryuunosuke. Are you worried about Sensei?"
An almost shy nod, followed by the boy shuffling back to Dazai's side.
"It's okay. Sensei and I are just on a date."
Oops. Dazai is choking again.
Chuuya hides a laugh behind his hand when the boy's eyes begin to+
An almost shy nod, followed by the boy shuffling back to Dazai's side.
"It's okay. Sensei and I are just on a date."
Oops. Dazai is choking again.
Chuuya hides a laugh behind his hand when the boy's eyes begin to+
shine with a newfound curiosity.
"What's that?" Ryuunosuke asks, head tilting all the way back to stare up at Dazai, who's at a loss for what he's allowed to say to a 5-year-old. Luckily, Chuuya has it covered.
"A 'date' is when you do something with the person you like."+
"What's that?" Ryuunosuke asks, head tilting all the way back to stare up at Dazai, who's at a loss for what he's allowed to say to a 5-year-old. Luckily, Chuuya has it covered.
"A 'date' is when you do something with the person you like."+
Chuuya's fairly simple explanation results in the boy's face lighting up, as if the entire situation has become crystal clear to him.
Reluctantly does Ryuu let go of Dazai and walks over to Chuuya, shifting all his attention to him, complete with wide, obsidian eyes and+
Reluctantly does Ryuu let go of Dazai and walks over to Chuuya, shifting all his attention to him, complete with wide, obsidian eyes and+
furrowed eyebrows.
"Then...do you like Sensei, too?"
A contemplative hum reaches the ears of both the expectant young boy and the indiscreet man across from him.
"Maybe," he says at last, relishing in the way Dazai physically deflates the tiniest bit. "I'm not sure yet."+
"Then...do you like Sensei, too?"
A contemplative hum reaches the ears of both the expectant young boy and the indiscreet man across from him.
"Maybe," he says at last, relishing in the way Dazai physically deflates the tiniest bit. "I'm not sure yet."+
Apparently, /that/ does not sit well with Ryuunosuke. In fact, he's almost appalled at what his youthful ears are hearing and immediately jumps to his defense.
"Why not? What's wrong with Sensei? He's the coolest person in the whole world!"
His short arms are spread as wide+
"Why not? What's wrong with Sensei? He's the coolest person in the whole world!"
His short arms are spread as wide+
possible, his rather endearing way of accentuating just how 'cool' his teacher is.
The teacher in question is gratefully nodding along, pausing once to give Chuuya a double thumbs up and a goofy smile.
"Really?" the redhead asks, if only to allow Dazai a chance to milk the+
The teacher in question is gratefully nodding along, pausing once to give Chuuya a double thumbs up and a goofy smile.
"Really?" the redhead asks, if only to allow Dazai a chance to milk the+
praises.
"Mhm!" Small hands find purchase on Chuuya's thighs, supporting the weight of the little boy, whose excitement to tell him about what makes his teacher the coolest person alive just couldn't possibly be done on his own.
"Like that one time, when dummy Atsushi cried+
"Mhm!" Small hands find purchase on Chuuya's thighs, supporting the weight of the little boy, whose excitement to tell him about what makes his teacher the coolest person alive just couldn't possibly be done on his own.
"Like that one time, when dummy Atsushi cried+
about not wanting to leave the penguins, so Sensei stole it! Or when Kunikida-sensei said we couldn't keep the stray dog that came to our playground, but then Sensei pinky promised us not to tell anyone and adopted it anyway. Or when..."
The color begins to gradually drain from+
The color begins to gradually drain from+
Dazai's face, not because he didn't want Chuuya finding out about any of his grandiose actions - he already knew of the penguin incident anyway.
No, the person he's worried about is the father of two that's smiling much too sweetly in his direction for it to not be a threat.+
No, the person he's worried about is the father of two that's smiling much too sweetly in his direction for it to not be a threat.+
/"Dazai."/
The brunet tenses up, especially when a hand firmly clamps down on his shoulder.
"A word, please."
"Odasaku, wait. My date-"
-is currently absorbed in Ryuunosuke's nonstop reiteration of all the other animals Dazai has successfully snuck into their kindergarten,+
The brunet tenses up, especially when a hand firmly clamps down on his shoulder.
"A word, please."
"Odasaku, wait. My date-"
-is currently absorbed in Ryuunosuke's nonstop reiteration of all the other animals Dazai has successfully snuck into their kindergarten,+
of all the times Dazai snuck /the kids/ out of the kindergarten, and so on and so forth, with each new revelation increasing the severity of the lecture he'll be receiving the second Oda drags him to a secluded room.
On the bright side, Chuuya is certain that he's 100% ready to+
On the bright side, Chuuya is certain that he's 100% ready to+
commit to dating this eccentric teacher that not only evaded jail time for being a fucking creep but also for stealing a goddamn zoo's worth of animals for his kids.
Perhaps his worst crime is stealing Chuuya's heart, but he'll never tell.
Truly, a skilled criminal, he is.
Perhaps his worst crime is stealing Chuuya's heart, but he'll never tell.
Truly, a skilled criminal, he is.
/// @kiroiimye this isn't the 100k word fic you wanted, but I hope this mini continuation will suffice until I have the energy to attempt it 
I hope you had a happy birthday and that you received lots of love on your special day!!! 
///
I hope you had a happy birthday and that you received lots of love on your special day!!! ///
