Love is making sure that your shadow self isn’t trying to ruin your healthy relationship.

Love is confronting your shadow self constantly, since you don’t want your personal demons to hurt the person that you love.

Love is realizing how beautiful you are and ugly you are — and hoping the person you love has the patience and care to stick around.

Love is an excavation process of your deepest truths and your deepest pains, and it is not one that sticks around for surface level play.

Love demands both feet in a relationship, and until you have both feet planted, discomfort and uncertainty will be screaming at you from a corner.

Love is patient and kind, but also uncomfortable and terrifying: Am I being too honest? Does this person really want to love me and know all of me? Do I know that I am worthy of a love this deep?

This is why falling in love is self-love work. You have to love and compassionately care for all the parts of yourself [that are beautiful and ugly] to bring them to the surface, to meet the eyes of someone ready to adore you and hold your hand and demand better from YOU.

A large part of shadow work in a relationship is not repeating the behaviors and patterns of your parents:

In what ways do you mimic your parents toxic behavior? How does that show up in your relationship? What support do you need to release that behavior?

What type of love do you want? What type of love do you believe you’re worthy of? How can you love yourself deeper to make space for a deeper love?