My suicidal mates and me agreed that we can always ring each other to ask for help. Even at 2am. I've been the one to call and the one to pick up the call and I'm yet to get in a situation where 'you have the capacity to kill yourself' has ever been helpful to say aloud. https://twitter.com/jaunty_aphorism/status/1376947324346376192

In my experience, my first suicide attempt was age 12, suicidal feeling are like an emergency exit appearing in my brain. Once that exit door installed itself, it has always glowed w possibility. My survival has been moving away from the glow, away from that option /2

I believe that suicidality is a coping mechanism from a childhood where I didn't have the power to escape. I needed to know an exit route was available. It helped me endure the present moment. But recovery for me has been 3/

Learning that I can build safety and pleasure and connection in this moment, I am not that kid anymore. As an adult, I have ALL the choices that bring alive has to offer. I don't have to live in the ashes of my past. /4

So for a mh professional to say that I could go through that door if I really wanted to - that would be putting me back in that scary past. If you are so short sighted that you cannot talk with me about the future ahead, then what are you doing in m h care?

If you don't really believe that people with serious, acute mental illness can make a meaningful life on their terms, can find something better than death, then just quit and do something else. We don't need you in our National Health Service.