You know what I’ve realized? If other Christians can speak with incontrovertible certainty, then so can I. I dare to speak with the same power and authority they believe they hold — not because I care for “doctrinal purity” or “orthodoxy,” but precisely because I don’t.

I am not meant to placate their beliefs or pretend they are a valid “option” like some innocent preference for a Häagen-Dazs ice cream flavor. They’re not. Their beliefs kill people. Mine — and many others in the beautiful smorgasbord of worldview alternatives! — do not.

I am at the point in my life where if I have one more evangelical tell me who I am in God’s eyes, I will not hesitate to rebuke them in the name of Jesus. I will speak in tongues, lay hands, and cast demons of bigotry out of them. Do not make me go into full-Pentecostal anarchy.

I will tell them to forsake their sinful lifestyle of legalism. To take up their cross of certainty & comfort. To walk the narrow path of justice & liberation — even if the cost is losing their community. To truly believe that “Everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.”

I will tell them to let the religious scales fall off their eyes, repent of their biases and prejudices that come from the pit of nonexistent Hell, & pray to their face that they have eyes to see and ears to hear Spirit’s voice. I will act more confident than they ever will.

And hey, let’s be real. Maybe I won’t. Maybe I’ll be tired that day. That’s OK. And eh, it’s not like there are many close evangelicals in my life anymore — likely not any who’d say something. But we all know how you can cross paths with former pastors or religious strangers.

We all know how belief systems seep outside of church doors into society, from the highest legal offices to everyday working class professionals. That is why I am ready. And I realized... I can act just as fucking assertive and self-assured as they taught me to be. We all can.