Ground rules:
- I'm sure I'm not the first person who's had this realization. Please don't "but we already knew that" at me, if I'm just realizing it now, I'm sure there are others who are too.
- I'm definitively not saying one option is "better" than other options in this thread

So there's a phenomenon we run into a LOT in #ttrpg hobby space. It's often centered around Dungeons and Dragons, for reasons including Pop-Culture Gateway and Market Dominance and then some, but we see it in other games as well. You've probably encountered it.

It's usually encountered from one of two directions, either:
- "So-and-so is a min-maxer/powergamer, ew", or
- "Why, we sometimes go many sessions without even touching the dice/rules!"

This is a really fascinating phenomenon, because it touches on something unique to RPGs.

In every game, you play the game by engaging with the rules. Like, reductively, that's *how you play games*. That's *all of it*. If you're playing chess, you play it by engaging with the rules. If you're playing Arkham Horror, you play it by engaging with the rules.

Sometimes, your group believes that certain rules are not a fit for your playstyle, or that the game would be better with other rules. You leave out a rule that says players may not share an interior space. You add a rule that lets you collect Free Parking money. That's cool.

But RPGs are unique among games in my experience, because only in RPGs do people face intense criticism for not only being skilled at engaging with the rules, but having a desire to engage with the rules, getting satisfaction from engaging with the rules.

You think that a baseball team isn't constantly looking for new ways to engage with their rules? Some are playing it safe, checking to make sure that the new bat technology fits within league guidelines, that their pitchers are holding the ball VERY legally.

Others are looking for exceptions they can push, all the time, I *guarantee* you. The only thing unrealistic about the "Air Bud" exception is that dogs cannot safely play modern baseball! If a dog could, I GUARANTEE you some team would argue that there's no rule AGAINST it.

This is not unique to competitive games: an Arkham Horror game will universally go much more smoothly if one or more of the players is skilled at rules, edge cases, exceptions, and interactions!

Now, that player also shouldn't be a JERK, or CRUEL, but that's a different talk.

"But, Jazz, you said this was about RPGs"

Yeah absolutely. It is the year 2021 and we are still getting comments and discourse shaming people for enjoying rules.

"Oh, she's a ROLL-player, not a ROLE-player" (I get that one a lot, I hate it).
"Oh we don't optimize here".

"Oh, ew, they're min-maxing".

In NO OTHER GAME do we shame people for this! Sure, we will absolutely ask the skilled Netrunner player to maybe NOT bring her Lockdown-winning Jinteki deck to a friendly learn-to-play event, but we don't shame her for being GOOD.

Similarly, no one plays Netrunner to NOT engage with the rules. No one plays chess to NOT engage with the rules. No one plays Football to...

"Wait what about teams that don't pass?"

I'm glad you asked, hypothetical me!

See, a team that doesn't pass because the rules of passing are a bad interaction with their skills, a Netrunner deck that doesn't face-check ice because the player doesn't have the practice, an Arkham Horror player that doesn't do Water Movement?

They're still engaging with the rules. They're skipping specific instances for their own reasons, but they're doing so in full compliance with all the rules, and that is itself a form of engagement.

Of Min-Maxing, if you will. Minimixing weaknesses, maximizing strengths.

When a football team focuses on ball-handling and running in their gameplay, because their passing game is weak, we don't scorn them for min-maxing! We CHEER them for knowing how their game is played!

"But that's not why I play RPGs"

Yes, I'm about to get there, hang on.

See, there IS a category of person who is involved with games, but not engaged with the rules. You might not PLAY baseball and not engage with the rules...

but you sure can WATCH baseball and not engage with the rules. Heck, in my personal experience? That's most folks.

The fans, the audience? These people are still 100% part of the baseball EXPERIENCE. They aren't going there to engage with the rules of baseball. Oh, they aren't usually ignorant, they like to know what's going on, but knowledge and engagement are different.

If you're cheering for your baseball team, you probably want to know why it's good that the guy with the stick hit the ball over the wall and now everyone is running. I mean, no, you don't HAVE to, but it deepens the experience. Home Runs are awesome.

What you DON'T have to know is the precise millimeter dimensions of the strike zone and the rules about weather and wind interference and brushing against clothes and how that can disqualify a third strike, turning it into a ball, under some circumstances.

You are allowed to just be a part of the EXPERIENCE, and it is still participatory, because what is a spectator sport without spectators? Would people still play pro baseball without a crowd? If you did not build it, would they still come?

"OK what does this have to do with #dnd5e, I had a total sportsendectomy when I was a kid, I'm one of the cool nerds, not one of the sports sheep"

Well first off, not-hypothetical-at-all person, fuck you, sports are pretty cool, it's compulsory sports culture that isn't.

Second off:

#TTRPGs - particularly #DnD but not solely - have a unique blend of both factions here.

You play the game by engaging with the rules.

You are a participatory part of the experience and the audience.

And players are, historically, NOT prepped at all for this.

OBLIGATORY STATEMENT:

Being "good at the rules" and "skilled at finding interactions and exceptions" and "good at juicing the maximum out of every interaction" is NOT LICENSE TO ABUSE YOUR FELLOW PLAYERS.

THAT'S BAD.

DON'T FUCKING DO IT.

But I'm not talking about communication tools here. I mean, seriously, communication is important. Consent is important, safety is important, this is all vital stuff. Please take as read that I am a HUGE advocate for communication, ethical treatment, and honest kindness.

But a lot of other people have already talked about that and it's tangential, and I'm already way off track here so uh

RIGHT

BACK ON TRACK

So here's the thing.

Both aspects are vital. Tabletop games, particularly RPGs, are practically unique in that they blend these.

Spectator sports? Totally separate, even if other teams are in the stands.

Board games? You gotta engage the rules, or you're just watching.

Video games? Same thing: if you're playing a video game, you're either engaging with the rules because that's how they're coded, engaging with them by not doing the part you don't like, or engaging with them by modding them.

Even solo cRPG's.

MMO's, whether they're MMORPGs or other MMOs with social aspects? They blur the lines a LITTLE, but not to tabletop extent. The expectation is still that you will engage with and be somewhat decent at the game you are here to play.

So, why, in tabletop games, do people take pride in being obstreperous? Why do they actively tear down the players who enjoy interacting with the mechanisms of the game itself, taking pride in "I'm an ANTI-minmaxer, I'm as useless as it's possible to me", or worse?

Honestly there are a lot of reasons. One reason is that the story we're sold, especially for D&D, does not match up with the reality of the game. We're promised a game where you can do anything, tell any story, try any action, and we're handed a creaky wargame engine.

Obligatory statement:

I have serious ethical problems with Hasbro, and with Wizards before them, and with TSR before them. I have major concerns and issues with individuals developing the game.

I do not hate D&D. I think it is often very poorly used, and doesn't fit everything.

So if it seems like I'm beating on good ol' D&D, yeah, I kind of am, but it's not out of an axe to grind:

it's because this game, the game that has become the USAian, and possibly the international, shorthand for "roleplaying game", the BIG game... hurts us from the start.

Because the presentation of this game, thanks to the cultural baggage of the game, for MULTIPLE generations - this isn't a "kids who just discovered 5E last year during quarantine thanks to CR" thing - drives a wedge between people who "roll the dice" and people who "roleplay".

And that wedge should not be there, because this hobby, uniquely among ALL games

Unlike its cousin in board gaming, unlike its neighbor in miniature gaming, unlike its classmate in fanfiction or art or sport

Requires both groups to merge and lift each other up.

So here's my challenge.

CELEBRATE the min-maxer. EMBRACE their powerful interactions. INVITE them to engage with you, to help you find character-appropriate combinations, to rejoice in the interactions of the moving bits.

Please do so with boundaries, of course: as an example, I have a functional maximum focus for tabletop games, if a turn takes "too long" to execute, I'll lose my place. I'm a skilled player, I'm a skilled DM, but I'm also disabled, and this is part of it.

You don't have to go all the way on a deep dive into 27 niche feats and spells from 38 books, you're allowed to know your limits and express "I'm looking for something cool and simple". I promise, that's better than "haha, look at the min-maxer". Embrace being good.

From the obverse:

EMBRACE the player skipping the obvious power combo for the flavor option. INDULGE yourself: see how you can tie your mechanics into the feel and mood of the group. REACH OUT and immerse your character in the "experience" side as well.

See what kind of bonds you can form with your fellow characters. The next time you use a powerful combo, give it a technique name and reminisce about the teacher you learned it from. Take a minute to pick flowers and press them with the wizard over tea.

You don't have to shun the rules - and even by making a choice to disengage for a moment, you're engaging with the rules (and sometimes, that's called a "short rest"). You don't have to turn it into a community theater improv bit - know your boundaries and comfort zones.

It's intimidating and humiliating to try to interact with someone, only to be told "you didn't say it right in character" or "you didn't make me believe it" (or some combination of "now that you roleplayed it, go ahead and roll"). Be free with your boundaries! It's okay!

But you can deepen the experience of your engagement with the rules by tying it to the other part of the game, and by letting yourself relax in the stands for a while.

It's okay not to be pushing for rolls all the time. Embrace BOTH kinds of story.

I'm wrapping up here because if I keep going, it's just going to get dissociated and tangent like an unkempt hedge flying through the moor in high winds, and that's just not going to be helpful.

I'm certain there's things I missed, and that's okay.

I hope this helped someone.

Parting notes:

Talk to each other. I mean, really, honestly, kindly talk to each other. That solves SO many small issues (and helps highlight unsolvable ones early).

Be ethical and kind to each other. When in doubt, be gracious.

Be open and respect boundaries with each other.