I’ve seen this comment on my timeline a few times before and I feel the FOB preference is for those who want cultural retention, because let’s face it, our parents don’t teach us shit imagine your Yoruba parents speaking Yoruba to each other and only speaking English to you https://twitter.com/dubonde_wav/status/1384985101038063620

I’ve seen this happen a lot of times, and it’s very strange that our parents will dilute us to the core and convince us that we’re not real Africans because we didn’t grow up back home. But when it’s time to marry, they dictate who and who to marry.

I’ve seen some parents in my community say they don’t want their kids with certain nationalities and that they hope they bring home a Nigerian, Ghanaian, etc. Meanwhile they ain’t teach their kids nothing about their background. I’m over here like

I’ve seen a shift of African women who were born abroad like myself, from rejecting “fob” men to eventually falling for one or wanting one. But again, there will be conditions. Because an African raised abroad, and an African raised back home are very different.

I knew when I was 19-20 that I wanted someone born back home. Cultural retention is very important to me and I want my child to know where they’re coming from, know their language, and know as much of their culture as possible.

I want my child to come home, speak English to me, then turn to their father and speak their father’s language with him. I want them to be better than me. I want them to be able to pinpoint exactly where they’re from in GH, and not be left lost like I was.

If they choose to marry Africans, great. If they want to swirl, cool. But I want them to know they come from somewhere, and hopefully, I’ll pass down that torch when it comes to pride in one’s heritage.