Izuku loves working with Camie. They're friends in and out of the agency. But today the bubbly girl is beyond lovably airheaded. She's completely spaced out.


"Wha? OH. Sorrry~ I'm just on a good sub drop rn, you know how it is."

His heart plummets.
Izuku looks down at the case papers and hums noncommittedly. Camie's too gone to catch a hint.

"Zu-zu, it is sooo good. My Tuesday guy last night, I call him T, is literally the only one I trust to give me a good drop. Some Doms are too
"'Scared' to give me a bad drop. Which, I guess, I probably would drop their ass if they did. But STILL. A Dom who can let drop me right into that sweet spot?"

She lets out a long sigh. Izuku risks looking up at her. Big mistake.
Her blissed out expression only makes his heart hurt more.
"It's honestly better than being high. Like, damn. It's that feeling in your stomach you get going down a rollercoaster. You can TELL you're falling, and falling, you're fucking sky diving!

"But then your Dom catches you," she sighs again as she plays with her hair. "And you...
She waves both hands through the air as she balances on the back legs of her chair. "Float. God, I only wished the feeling lasted longer because it feels GOOD up here in the-"


Camie loses balance, and her chair slams back down to earth. Her eyes are wide.
Izuku gets why.

He never yells. Not...not like that. He lowers his head and motions at the stacks of case files.

"Sorry," he mumbles, "can we just? Y'know, finish this? It's been a long day."

Camie's quiet for a moment, but Izuku doesn't look up or say anything else.
"Yup! Will do," she says cheerily but way too curt to be genuine.

Now she's pissed. Wonderful. Izuku pretends he doesn't notice while he secretly digs the nails of his left hand into the exposed skin of his left thigh under the table.

He loves Camie. But-
"How 'bout you, hun?" She says after only a minute of 'working.' "Our Angry Prince ever give you a good drop?"

Izuku forces his head up so he can give her a wry smile. "No, that's not really Kacchan's thing."

"Aw, shame!" Camie pouts, much more herself.
"Maybe you should bring it up next time! Spice it up in the bedroom!" She winks and then actually begins to speak about the case in front of her.

Izuku tries to follow along, but now it's him who spaced out.

After all, it's not that he's never experienced a Sub Drop.
It's rather, every time he and Kacchan has sex it ends in one.

And none of them are "good".
TBC! #bkdk More angst to come~
Izuku waves Camie a half-hearted goodbye when they finally finish their paperwork. It's a short walk from their agency to the apartment but the darkness makes the path in front of him stretch endlessly.

When he opens the door there's immediately a 'welcome'.

"You're late."
He is and he's not surprised to see his Kacchan scowling at him from down the hall.

"I'm sorry, there was a lot of paperwork."

Katsuki rolls his eyes as he walks to the kitchen. "There always is. No fucking point in skipping meals for something that can wait til morning.'
Katsuki pulls out a stack of bowls with plastic covers. Izuku can't help but smile. Kacchan's the best cook and always has food waiting for him when he comes home late.

One by one, miso soup, a bowl of rice, steamed veggies, and seasoned tofu are unveiled.
Kacchan even goes as far as heating the dishes for him, yelling that Izuku go sit at the table. Katsuki serves Izuku, all the bowls balanced into his two large hands, then sits by his side despite obviously already having eaten.

It's nice. Perfect.
They speak between Izuku's bites but aren't afraid to fall into extended bouts of silence. Katsuki's close enough that they bump elbows occasionally or for their thighs to touch.

Izuku's pretty sure Kacchan does it on purpose.
He loves Kacchan. And Kacchan loves him, though he hardly vocalizes it. His actions and acts of kindness are more than enough to prove it.

Izuku demands that he wash his own dishes. He's putting his last bowl to dry when he feels Katsuki behind him.
His breath catches.

Katsuki's hands slide against his waist before he pulls Izuku to him. To put his back flushed against his chest. To feel the hard dick pressed against his ass.

Izuku closes his eyes. His body shivers.

He knows what comes next.

Katsuki always asks first, though Izuku can never convince himself to say no.

"Yes," he exhales the word, letting go completely.

Tonight Kacchan starts by placing a hand at the back of his heads, fingers twisted in Izuku's curls.

Izuku bends at the waist at his command, pressing his abs onto the wet edge of the sink, soaking his shirt.

He doesn't care, can't care. His Sub heeds his Dom's commands. Izuku /needs/ to.

He can't disobey.

A Sub can't fight a Dom's command.
A Dom/Sub relationship isn't necessarily a commitment

But it is a partnership.

Some people have multiple Subs, even multiple Doms (like Camie), but it's more than just sex.

It's an agreement, a negotiation. An understanding of what's okay and what's not.
It's trust.

Once they start a relationship, a Sub can never deny their Dom without severing their partnership.

A Sub is at the mercy and command of their Dom.
Izuku didn't choose to be a Sub. You don't choose who are as much as you don't choose who you're attracted to or who you love.

Part of him thinks you can't really choose your partner.

Kacchan was his first and is his only Dom. For Izuku, it only ever was Kacchan.
Katsuki's never said, but Izuku knows its the same for him. Izuku has been his one and only Sub.

This is all they know.
The push of his pants to his ankles, the way Kacchan manhandles his ass. How he continues to kneed at it's flesh one-handed as he pulls down his own pants just enough to free his cock.


Izuku leans his head into the sink.

A shock goes through his spine. His legs snap apart as he stands on tiptoes, ready for what's to come. Ready for his Dom.

"Kacchan," he begs.

The low chuckle Katsuki makes vibrates through Izuku's back when he leans against it.
"Already begging? As expected from a slut of a Sub."

The cock inside him splits him in two. Izuku moans as loud as he can, surrounded by the echos that bounce off the metal sink.


Izuku's voice cuts off in a choke mid-moan.
He's silent the rest of the sex. Kacchan is not.

"Look at you take my cock so easy. You get enough practice, yet you still shake like a virgin. My dick too big for you, Deku? You bite off more than you can chew? That's saying something since I've seen what you can fit in there."
Every inch of Izuku is on fire. Arousal is his only focus.

There's no kitchen. No villains. No existence other than Kacchan.

He's full, physically and mentally. His soul feels clear like a slate wiped cleaned.

Izuku's eyelids flutter, his dick presses against the cabinets.

Izuku cums with a soundless scream. He paints the cabinet doors white with his cum.

Katsuki grunts. He pulls out and pushes Izuku to the side so he can cum on the cabinets too.

They're both panting.

Without Kacchan's hands on his hips, Izuku wobbles.
He tries to hold himself up by balancing on the edge of the sink, but he can't. He slides down to the floor, breath shallow.

Izuku looks up at Katsuki. He waits for his Dom's next command.

Kacchan looks down at him, eyes still glazed.
He looks different at times like these, though Izuku knows he's not.

"Clean this up."

Izuku struggles to stand. Katsuki stops him with a hand on his head.

"With your tongue."

Izuku falls back to his knees.
Without a second thought, Izuku begins to lick up their mixed ejaculate. His right eye twitches at the alkaline taste.

Katsuki watches him, for a while. But when the high starts to fade, Izuku can feel him shift his weight.

He hears Katsuki walk away. Hears the shower turn on.
Izuku stays and licks. He licks each spot of cum, dried or not.

He feels it coming as he finishes.

The drop.

He's nearly done with his Dom's command and Katsuki's no where to be found. The inner voice in his head begins to scream.
You upset your Dom. You weren't a good Sub. He left you. He's gone forever. He hates you. You never deserved him. You don't deserve anyone. If you can't make your Dom happy, who can you make happy? You're not fit to save anyone. You'll never be a hero. You'll never be worthy.
Katsuki comes back a few minutes late, but it's too late.

Izuku's in a drop.

Katsuki offers Izuku a hand, and he takes it on autopilot. He steers Izuku to the shower, let's go of his hand with a small squeeze.

It's not enough to keep Izuku's world from falling apart.
Talk about a speedy turn around! Thank you to hirocyonia, my anonymouse sugar guardian, and sabasama for this update and generally being amazing.
Camie says a Sub Drop is like sky-diving, but Izuku feels like he's been tossed overboard during a nasty storm.

Sometimes he's sinking and sinking, darkness swallowing him from all sides as he suffocates on the water filling his lungs.
Sometimes he's tossed into something hard. A boat passing by? A stray comment from his Dom's mouth?

"Oi, you done in there? I've got to brush my teeth and piss."

Izuku flinches at the words. BAD SUB, BAD SUB. Your Dom needs you out of the bathroom!
Izuku's soaking wet but he hasn't lathered his hair or emptied the cum from his ass.

He still jumps out of the shower, grabs a nearby towel, and opens the door for Katsuki.

"Sorry," Izuku manages to mutter.

Katsuki stares at him with questioning eyes.

Katsuki rubs at the back of his head. "Whatever. 'S fine."


Why else does he walk by without so much as a pat on the head? Why else does he not hold Izuku after sex and whisper how well he's done?
Aftercare is essential for a Sub. Without it, a Sub is left dirty and used.

Izuku always does what Katsuki asks of him. He never falters.

Yet, Katsuki moves on so quickly.
Kacchan never brings up sex unless they're about to fuck. It's as if their sex-life is an inconvenience; a negative balance in the registrar of their love. And Kacchan already gives so much.

He cooks, he cleans, he patches Izuku up when he pushes it too far.
And Izuku? What can he provide?
He doesn't remember getting in bed.

He's not sure when Katsuki joins him.

He can't register the lights turning off or the muscular arm that wraps around his side. Kacchan's grip is an anchor, but it doesn't tether him to reality.

Rather it drags Izuku further into hell.
Izuku wakes the next morning, only it's afternoon.

Katsuki's already left for his patrol; Izuku's got a couple of hours before his. They stopped trying to get the same shifts years ago.

The drop from the night before sticks to his skin.
His feet are heavy; his eyes sting. Izuku scratches his neck in a way that reminds him a bit too much of Shigaraki and that makes him flinch.

He's out of it enough to get ready. He goes out for a quick run before showering for real.

Honestly, he's used to this empty feeling.
Izuku goes about his day with his heart pulled from his chest and lungs completely deflated.

He saves a woman from being robbed, returns a cat to a grumpy teenage boy who still ends up thanking him, and takes out a villain they'd been tracking for months.

Today is a good day.
It just doesn't feel that way.

He wonders if the world can see it. The hesitation in his eyes, the drag of his step. He wonders if they know just by looking at him that he's not only a Sub, but a sad excuse for one at that. Izuku gives Subs a bad rap.
While Dom's get a lot of heat for keeping another human under their command, a bad Sub makes people look away with disgust.

Too needy. Too selfish. How can you ask someone to dominate you then bend under the smallest bit of pressure?

Izuku's a liar. He's fooling Kacchan.
"You tried it!"

He looks up with glazed eyes at the giant smile on Camie's face. It falters at his expression. She grits her teeth and presses air out the side of her mouth.

"Oof, bad first trip? Guess Angry Boi isn't as much of a master at everything as he clai-
"Shut up!" Izuku screams as he stands. The papers the cover his desk fall to the floor with what little remains of his self control.

"Don't talk about Kacchan like that! Don't talk like you know our relationship!"

Izuku knows Camie. She always smiles, like him, angry or not.
But in her big, bright eyes, there's a hard glint of something darker.

"Is there something you're not telling me, Zu zu?"

It's a threat and not against him. He's immediately on the defensive. "There's nothing you need to know."
"Oh no? Hey, Izuku, why don't you sit down?"

He feels like she's stabbed him with a set of dull scissors.

A Sub only heeds the demand of their Dom...or they're supposed to. There's exceptions to every rule.
Strong feelings held for an ex-Dom. When a Dom and a Sub have been in close contact for a very, very long time.

The most often exception: a Sub is in a Drop.

All strength in his legs vanish. He falls with a loud smack! on his office chair.
Izuku tilts his head down, watery eyes focused on the ground. Fuck. /FUCK./ He's fucked up. Camie surely knows his position and will make assumptions all her own.

Assumptions about his and Kacchan's agreement. Assumptions about Kacchan as a Dom.
Again he's failed Katsuki, and the dam finally breaks.

Izuku cries. He cries first into the empty air then into Camie's shoulder when she holds him.

"Shhh, shhh, it's okay, Zu. Let it go, feel your feelings. You did nothing wrong. You're such a good friend. I care for you hun."
Sweet nothings in his ear, a warm hand on his back, and the pressure of strong arms wrapped around his shoulders.

He calms for the first time since last night. The tears eventually dry up. They keep quiet, for a while.

When he can, Izuku says. "Let me explain."

So he does. He explains how he fails Kacchan as a Sub. How he never earns the aftercare he so desperately desires. How he does his best to follow Katsuki's commands, but he never hangs around afterward, not right away.
Camie bites her tongue while he speaks. Normally, Izuku would be impressed, but he's too busy wallowing in the misery that is the truth. When he finishes though, she doesn't waste any time.

"I'm going to beat his ass."

Izuku startles. "What! Did you not just hear what I-"
"Oh I heard you! And now /you/ listen to me! That is NOT a standard agreement. Any Dom worth his salt knows you can't end a session without some kind of come-down. No wonder you fucking fall to pieces, he lets you drop EVERY TIME?"

Izuku bows his head.
"Then what do I say? What do I do?"

And Camie tells him exactly what needs to happen next.

The words ring true, and they hurt worse than all his previous drops combined.
DUN DUN DUN. Trust me, you wanna know what happens next 😏😉

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Katsuki feels best the day after a session.

He clicks his tongue at the use of that word. It's better than saying after a fuck, he guesses. Yeah, that's what he and Izuku do, but it makes it seem like their relationship is vulgar.
As a hero, Katsuki is the epitome of vulgarity: loud, crass, and unafraid to put a person in their place with the fewest words possible.

Izuku's not like that though.

Deku's that poster-child, goody-two shoes, idyllic hero that makes PR teams fight to work with him.
Tch, imagine how they'd squirm if a video of Izuku licking cum off the cabinets hit the web. Shit would be viral in seconds.

And probably ruin Deku's career for life.
Katsuki kicks at the laundry basket he's just set down and sends clothes spread across the floor.

"Shit," he says without much bite and goes about picking them up.

He's definitely in a good mood because of last night's session, alright. Laundry's his least favorite chore.
Gotta make sure shit's not inside out, that socks match, that everything's pressed and folded just right. A pain in the ass of a task that he can't trust to Deku since he seems content to throw it all in a drawer.

But on a session high, Katsuki folds peacefully.
Almost peacefully.

His mind wanders to the image of Deku licking their cum again. What if he had recorded him?

Standing over him, phone out, he could zoom in on Izuku's fuck-out stare. Capture that sensual pink tongue trail against the wood in 4K, HD.

Then he could rewatch it.
Katsuki kicks at the basket again, but it's already knocked over.

Stop that, asshole! Stop thinking shit like that!

He knows he can't record any of his and Deku's sessions; can't risk doing anything to jeopardize their careers or relationship.
Exhibitionism is impossible. He can't leave marks that might bring up questions. Fuck, Katsuki has to be careful not to initiate a command around anyone else, even when he sees Izuku slipping.

There's no shame in being a Sub, but Katsuki fucking hates being a Dom sometimes.
He fits the stereotype too well. The loud, aggressor who always takes charge and commands others. Katsuki might as well be a joke.

But, he likes to be in charge, /needs/ to be in charge to feel at ease. It's not something he can turn off if he wanted to.
Plus, having a Sub who puts all their trust in him feeds that yearning to be trustworthy. To be seen as good and reliable and lovable.

All qualities he can't see in himself.

Once he felt that trust, Katsuki was hooked. He can't be happy without it.
The fact that Deku is his Sub? That he's the one who trusts him and makes him feel so good?

Katsuki doesn't know if it's a case the cosmos smothering them in some sick irony or some poetic justness.
Izuku's always followed him around.

It took longer for Katsuki to realize he needed him to.
Because of their past, Katsuki hates the thoughts that creep into his mind.

The things he wants to do with Deku, to do TO him.

His sexual fantasies intertwine with his need for dominance. Izuku's undying commitment to submission feeds the flames of a fire deep in Katsuki's soul
It'd be easier if he didn't love Deku.

If Deku was some random Sub from one of those clubs downtown, Katsuki would lay it all out on the line.

The dirty, grimy acts that give him wet dreams. The boundaries he wants to test to their limits, then possibly overcome.
Katsuki would ask for what he wants, get it, and then give whatever the extra wanted in return. A transaction. Nothing more.

But his sub /is/ Izuku.

HIS Deku.
The snot-nose brat he grew up with. The one who wore All Might undies until Katsuki made him throw them out when they moved in together.

Izuku, son of Auntie Inko who comes with his family to shrines on New Years and who makes the best snickerdoodles.
It's wrong.

It feels...wrong.

He shouldn't be imaging Deku's face beneath his foot, sucking on his toe. He shouldn't want to bring him down to the laundry room and watch him get off on the vibrations of the dryers at the risk of getting caught by a neighbor.
He shouldn't want Izuku to want him to do those things to him either.

Katsuki feels ashamed of his own thoughts.
So, Katsuki doesn't bring them up. He loves his sessions with Deku, knows they both need them to stay level-headed with their stressful lives as heroes.

But he keeps his actions to a minimum. He holds back, where he can. Not that he always can.
Sometimes, he slips, like last night, and asks Izuku to do something that he normally wouldn't. That he fears is a step too far.

He always comes out of their sessions first.

Even riding on a Dom high, Katsuki sees what he's done and feels his stomach drop.
It's remorse. It's fear.

Fear that today's the day he went to far and that Deku's going to end their agreement. That Katsuki's a bad Dom who abused the situation with whatever he did.

As much as it pains him, Katsuki forces himself to step away.
He takes a cold shower or stuffs a towel in his mouth to bite into. Anything to keep from doing something else he'll regret.

Then he waits.

He waits for Deku to come say he's through with this. Through with Katsuki. That tonight is indeed their last night as a Dom/Sub pair.
Izuku never says that though. Sometimes, Katsuki's forced to retrieve him and help him come out of a session, but he still never says a bad word about him.

Katsuki always asks if Deku wants to have a session.

Izuku always says yes.
Maybe the concern's misplaced, but Katsuki can't fight it off. He wants to be the Dom Izuku deserves, but fears what would happen if he actually spelled out the depravity in his head.

Katsuki couldn't handle Izuku leaving him.

The front door opens and finally he can breathe.
Thank fuck, he's back from work. Mostly on time, but still Katsuki half-yells, "Again? What did I-"

Katsuki freezes in the hall. Izuku hasn't taken off his shoes and he's looking at the ground.

On his shoulder is the bag of emergency clothes for a sudden mission.
Told you we're just getting started!

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Annnnddd we're back!!!

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Katsuki furrows his brow as he takes in the scene in front of him.

"Seriously? A mission? Why didn't you text me or something, I could've brought the bag to you at the agency."

Izuku's eerily silent, concerningly so. His lack is response is the first red flag.
The second red flag is less of a warning and more of a flare set off, aimed directly at his face.

"We need to talk."

Four words. Only four words. And each is a knife to the chest.

As far as Katsuki's concerned, there is no worse sentence he can hear. Especially for a guy like him.

Katsuki hates to "talk it out." He hates when he has mandatory therapist appointments or has to explain his injuries to his doctor.
He hates calling his parents or his friends. It's so much fucking easier to text or be there in person because he can respond with actions. He can show he cares because he's fucking there, is he not?

A present, a hug, a kiss; anything is easier than words.
We need to talk might as well be a death sentence.

A boss says "we need to talk," and suddenly he's chewed out or nearly fired.

A friend says "we need to talk," and now they're yelling because of some slight he had no intention of or clue that it occurred.
A significant other says it...

Katsuki nods sharply to Izuku, but the jerky movement sends a shooting pain through his head. Now he can feel the throb of his heartbeat pressing on his brain.

Izuku doesn't respond. Katsuki wonders if he didn't see his nod.
Despite the desert in his throat, Katsuki manages to say, "Fine."

Then he turns; his hands stuffed in his pockets so he can turn them into tight fists without Deku seeing. He starts to walk back toward the living room and feels the distance between him and Izuku grow.
Maybe this is all a misunderstanding. Shit like this happens all the time between partners and between Doms/Subs.

Aw, fuck. This is probably about last night. Of course if fucking is!

Katsuki knew he'd stepped too far. Izuku must be angry about what he commanded of him.
The truth unfolds like a map in his head; it becomes clear how they wound up here. Katsuki's depravity led to a boundary crossed and now Deku's picked up a mission just to get away.

There's other paths, surely, ones where it's /Katsuki/ blowing this out of proportion.
But at his core, he knows those aren't his reality. Those are what this is.

Katsuki's fucked up and he's going to have to form some sort of decent apology from the pile of random spare parts that make up his "emotional intelligence."
He's five steps further away when he realizes Deku's not following him. Katsuki looks over his shoulder to see Izuku in the same spot right in front of the door.

"...You in a hurry to go or something? Thought you wanted to talk."
Katsuki's eyes flash down to Izuku's mouth as he runs the tip of his pink tongue across pressed lips.

It's a tell. A cute one, usually. One that helps Katsuki know when Deku's up to something or hiding a new figure he said he most definitely wasn't going to buy.
Funny how something you once loved can strike fear into your heart.

"I'm not going on a mission, Kacchan."
He's never turned around faster. "Then where are you going?"

Izuku doesn't answer. His eyes are trained on the floor as if he's speaking to it. As if Katsuki isn't right in front of him, about to lose his shit from the dread that threatens to swallow him whole.
"Where are you going, Deku?"

"I'm staying with Camie."

That's- well, it's not a bad response. Katsuki knows Camie, they're on good terms. Izuku's close friends with her since they work together at the agency often and she never shuts the fuck up.
So why does Katsuki not feel any better?

"What you plan a fucking girl's night out or something? A text woulda been fine. I'm not your keeper."

He's trying to sound nonchalant, like it's not a big deal that Deku's got a bag on his shoulder and won't look at him in the eye.
Except it's getting harder to keep the tremor from his voice.

"How," Katsuki clears his throat, "How long you staying?"

There's a moment of hesitation, and that's the third red flag. Only it's a hand grenade stuffed down Katsuki's throat.

"I-I don't know."
"...What's that supposed to fucking mean?"

Again, Deku doesn't respond, but Katsuki can't wait a second longer.

"Deku, what the fuck does that mean! Answer me, Sub!"
Katsuki doesn't call Izuku a Sub out of sessions. It feels different when they're not in the heat of the moment, out of their minds on the high that comes from unbridled pleasure.

It feels wrong.

But Deku's response feels worse.
"I want to end our agreement."

Now it's Katsuki's turn to be silent.

He stares at Deku, seeing him with fresh eyes, /seeing/ him for the first time.

His partner looks tired. The only color to his face are the dark circles under his eyes. His curls are loose and lack their usual sheen.
Izuku won't look him in the eyes, but Katsuki can see the pain behind them anyway. The tears that well up in his partner's eyes are uncommon, but tonight each one that drops is nuclear fallout.

...Did Izuku look like that this morning? Last night? How long has he...
There's a fire inside Katsuki; there always has been. It's a flame he stokes when a villain pisses him off or one that settles to a few bright embers when Izuku's asleep by his side.

Now it feels like Deku just poured a bucket of water on it. Or maybe that was Katsuki.
He still can't speak. Katsuki is worse than stunned.

He's castrated.


Untethered from the very anchor that's always kept him grounded.



He doesn't want Katsuki anymore.

And Katsuki can't even say he's surprised.
Because he knew this would happen. He knew that the thoughts inside his head would be the crux that led to his, their demise. That one day, Katsuki would push Deku away, because that's what he always does! That's all Katsuki can do, isn't it? Fuck shit up?
Who would want to be with an angry bastard who is an explosion waiting to happen?

Who would want a Dom who can't even make the kindest, most forgiving Sub trust him?

If he couldn't be with Deku...did he even want to be someone else's Dom?
Katsuki doesn't know the answer. He doesn't know any of those answers.

All he knows is what he has to say.

"Alright. Our agreement is void."
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Part of Izuku hopes that Kacchan will refuse his request.

He wants his Dom to put his foot down, to tell Izuku that they can't break off their agreement. Prays that Katsuki screams how stupid the suggestion is and how that'll never happen.

Izuku wants Katsuki to fight for them.
Except he doesn't.

Katsuki stares at him without actually seeing him, as it he's looking past him. His eyes are glazed. His mind is elsewhere.

Yet his words slice clear through the guard Izuku pieced together on his way home.

"Alright. Our agreement is void."
There's a snap. In his head. In his heart. In his very soul.

Izuku feels the end of his and Katsuki's Dom/Sub relationship break in a physical sense.

That's it. That's the end. One sentence ends a relationship that's lasted all of their adult lives.
Two sentences, technically.

Because Izuku's the one who asked first.

But he hadn't meant it. He hadn't! He forced the words out because he knew Camie had been right.

The dysfunction of his and Kacchan's relationship was unsustainable. It was unfair.

To the both of them.
And still, Izuku couldn't mean the words he spoke. He could never truly choose to not be Kacchan's Sub, the same way Izuku could never choose to not love Kacchan.

He can lie. He can hide. But a soul is never fooled.

Deep in his being, he knows he wants to stay by Kacchan's side
For an agreement to break, it /requires/ at least one user to truly want it to end. A safety mechanism to save partners from toxic words during a heated argument or something called out when in the throes of passion.

That means if Izuku can feel their agreement end...
Katsuki wants it to.
He wants to truly end their arrangement.

Does that mean he always wants them as a couple to end?

Izuku feels the oxygen deplete from his lungs as the fire that burns the only life Izuku's ever known to ashes eats him whole. His eyes begin to water from invisible smoke.
He doesn't think he'll survive this.
He also doesn't have a choice.

Izuku has no claim to his pain. No license to his own tears. No right to yell or scream that Katsuki can't do this! He can't just-just say alright! Like all of this meant nothing to him! To them!

He can't reject his own request.
Izuku's won a battle he never wanted to start.

But he did and so he has to own that

Slowly Izuku shakes his head. It helps keep his hands from shaking though his breath is unsteady.

"Thank you "
His own words make Izuku sick, but he knows Kacchan. He blames himself, even when he's not at fault.

This time, he has done wrong. He's let Izuku drop more times than he can count. He's /made/ Izuku drop as Camie corrected.
Izuku has lived with the sensation of falling for so long that the only times he knows for certain he's not in a drop is when he's afraid of falling into one.

That doesn't mean he wants Katsuki to feel the same way.

As hard as it is, Izuku forces himself to watch Kacchan.
He looks for the tell-tale signs that he's about to self-destruct.

...but he looks okay. Shaken, hurt, but stable. There's this look of disgust in his eyes that Izuku wasn't expecting. It strikes him like a backhanded slap as his mind supplies,
"What kind of Sub demands something of their Dom? You're still a failure who couldn't handle what you asked for."

Izuku can't stay here.

"I-I'm going to go," he says with only a slight stutter. His legs are much more wobbly as he turns for the door.

He opens it.
Then he stops.

He looks back at Katsuki because he has to know before he goes.

"Can I come back?"

Izuku really asks, /are we still a couple if we aren't a Dom/Sub pair?/

"Do you want to?"
Again, not what Izuku's expecting. He has no answered prepared.

Katsuki's eyes narrow and his upper lip pulls into a snarl. "Do what ever you want, Deku. You're not /mine/ anymore."

Then he leaves the hallway first. He leaves Izuku in the same spot in front of the door.
It takes Izuku a second, but then he leaves the apartment all together.
He can't escape the words, though.

You're not mine anymore.

Not mine.



The words haunt Izuku.

He doesn't know what hurts more: that he was nothing but a Sub to Katsuki. A person to be commanded, dominated, used as his 'owner' saw fit.
Or that he is no longer Kacchan's.

Katsuki's still HIS, as far as Izuku's concerned. Kacchan will always be HIS Kacchan. Izuku's first and only love. His first Dom. (It's still impossible to imagine having a Dom other than Kacchan).

How can Katsuki toss him away so easily?
So the words never leave his head. He hears them in his sleep (or lack thereof). As he waits for Camie to finally leave her only bathroom. He hears Katsuki's voice as he patrols or does paperwork or eats or cleans or speaks of

"You can't come back to the place tonight."
Izuku jumps at Camie's voice. "What! Wait, why not?"

"Because," Camie whines then clears her throat. "Look Zu zu, I /love/ you, I do. You're one of my closest friends and the only reason we haven't fucked is because we'd be fighting for the crown of pillow princess
"BUT, a girl's got to get LAID!" Camie stands back and grabs both of her boobs with her hands. "My girls are withering away from neglect! It's been 3 weeeeekss. Since you said I can't bring a Dom over while you're staying in my studio, ya needs to find another place tonight."
"Seriously?!" Izuku puts a palm to his forehead. "It's nearly midnight! Who am I supposed to ask on such short notice? Can't you go to one of your Dom's places instead?"

"Ew, no. I'm not going to some potential murder den. I don't know them like that."
"But you're having /sex/ with them?"

"Fucking them," she corrects.

Izuku shakes his head. "Camie, I've got no where to go."

"Wellll, I know some really nice rebound Doms who-"

"No," Izuku snaps, his voice hard. "I told you I didn't-"

"'want another Dom' yea, yea, look Izuku
"As much as I want you to get laid and get over that-" "Don't-" "/Guy/, I can't force you. Still! I have my own needs and you can't keep me from meeting them. This kitty needs to be fed!"

Izuku doesn't have to look to see where she's pointing. He slides his hand down to his eyes
"Fine. You're right; it's your place. Thank you for letting me stay in general."

Izuku feels a set of lips on his forehead but they burn on his skin. They're too full to be Kacchan's.

"Thanks Darling!" Camie says with a wave as she practically skips out of the office.
Izuku sighs and sinks into his chair.

Great. Now what?
He decides against asking one of his friends and drags himself into one of the "on-call" rooms at the agency. It's the last choice option, seeing as lots of heroes prefer to sleep slumped over their desk then on the concrete beds.

They're so uncomfortable, Izuku doesn't sleep.
Not that he usually does, but now his shoulders and back ache when he leaves the room at 7 am.

He's mid-stretch when his arm bumps into someone walking by.

"Sor-" Izuku cuts off. His whole body turns without him moving a muscle.

I think I might have gone overboard but the music I had playing was giving me lots of feels ❀ thanks again to Ally and Snaggy!

You can make the next update happen tonight with the dono goal otherwise see y'all next week, I'ma go cry 😱 https://ko-fi.com/vgcss4 
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