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I& #39;m tired of caring about what people think of me, I& #39;m tired for apologising about things that I don& #39;t understand or can& #39;t control, I& #39;m tired of having to defend myself for just saying "I don& #39;t think we& #39;d be good friends". I am officially giving up on caring about what others th-
-ink of me. I am ME. there is only one ME. and if you don& #39;t fucking like the ME that you get, then you can go find a different person who you DO LIKE. I& #39;m not going to hate myself anymore to boost your damn ego. I am proud to be me. And whilst there are things I don& #39;t like about
myself, I am not going to shit on myself just for having those flaws, I am going to accept them and - if possible - I will try my very best to get rid of those flaws. I am not scared to say who I really am. And to prove it, I& #39;ll say it right now. So listen up!
I am a 14 year old girl who has to suffer from autism, ADHD, an undiagnosed anxiety disorder and possibly BPD too! I find it hard to open up to people, and I& #39;m really scared to become close to people out of fear that they& #39;ll abandon me, like many before them already have done. B-
-ut once I& #39;ve gotten comfortable with you, I will absolutely ADORE you and never want to live a life without you! If you leave, then I& #39;ll admit, I& #39;ll get super emotional about it and cry over you, but after 3 days of you being gone. I& #39;ll have already moved on and stop caring.
I deal with anger issues (which could be caused by my constant anxiety being turned into anger or some shit like that), and when I have fits of anger, my logic can be hard to understand. But even when I& #39;m angry, I& #39;m usually not actually angry at you, it& #39;s just misdirected.
I can& #39;t phrase things properly, I can& #39;t understand most common things, I can& #39;t understand how a person is feeling through text in most situations, I can& #39;t understand why others act or think a specific way at times, I can& #39;t assume the worst of someone immediately due to anxiety.
I can& #39;t do many things that normal people can do because I& #39;m not normal. As much as my parents and friends (who haven& #39;t left me.. Yet) want to tell me that I& #39;m normal and perfect. They can& #39;t say it and be right. I& #39;m not normal, I& #39;m not special, I& #39;m not PERFECT. but that& #39;s fine.
Because, despite the trauma, abuse, self-loathing, anxiety and lack of empathy, sympathy, emotional connection and understanding. I am still HUMAN. I can still TRY to understand a person& #39;s actions. I can still TRY to comfort someone who I don& #39;t like or don& #39;t know. I can still TR-
-Y to understand why someone is upset about something, or why they do not like talking about specific things, ect. I can still.. TRY.. And that& #39;s okay. I can still feel, despite being a person with disabilities. I am still human, despite being a Lesbian. I still deserve respect,
Because I am human. And just because you don& #39;t understand me, doesn& #39;t mean that you get to treat me like shit and use my own body against me to get what you want. Oh yeah, and don& #39;t think that my episodes are all my fault. They never have been, they& #39;re uncontrollable breaks from
Reality where I can& #39;t think or control my own body. What happens during an episode is completely out of my control. Never think that you have the right to be a dick to me because I had an episode. Once it& #39;s over I& #39;ll have most likely already apologised for it the best I could.
There, that& #39;s all I have to say. So remember. If you don& #39;t like me, then I don& #39;t fucking care. What you see is what you get. If you don& #39;t like what you see, then don& #39;t get it. I have my own problems, and if you aren& #39;t able to accept that. Then don& #39;t whine about it to me.
