AN OPEN LETTER TO @memetwalker:
The @SternShow is slowly withering away. My suggestions on what Howard Stern can do to stem the decline:
1) Stern needs to fire @robertAbooey. Gary Dell'Abate has shown himself incapable or unwilling to put forth the effort to make the Stern Show

2/ entertaining and relevant. He's old & lazy with a fragile ego & zero work effort. The Stern Show gets a "celebrity" interview once every two weeks as opposed to three times a week as Stern dictated in that infamous Stern Show Meeting leak (). As a result

3/ of not getting celebrities, Stern relies on scripted comedy bits, the majority of them taped. Which leads me to my second suggestion:
2) Fire half the "writers" immediately. Whoever wrote the "Ronnie gets hypnotized" bit, fire him. Whoever wrote the "Sal gets hypnotized" bits,

4/ fire them. Whoever wrote "Priest and Boy," fire him. Whoever wrote the "Millie Bobby Brown's Agent" bit, fire them. Whoever wrote the fake, phony "Kathy" phone calls, fire Chris Wilding. And also fire @thisiswolfie. His taped "bits" are designed to do nothing more than to

5/ titillate Stern's latent homosexual fantasies (oh yeah, fire the "writers" that came up with "Cocktober). Serious question, Memet, if Stern is so pro-gay, why is he always mocking Gays with his exaggerated, lisping "gay" voice?" And why the "Are You Gay?" lie detector bit?

6/ Which brings me to the next point:
3) The Show would become more compelling, real, and relevant if Stern finally came out of the closet and confesses that he and Beth do NOT in fact have "bang o'clock" (whoever created that phrase, fire him) and that their "marriage" is this

7/ decade's version of the Michael Jackson / Lisa Marie Presley "marriage." And when Stern exits the closet, he needs to leave behind his "hair system." Listening to Stern humiliate himself gaslighting his dwindling listener base that his "hair" is "real" is sad and depressing.

8/ Other than the most severely challenged "Wack Packers," who does Stern think he's fooling?
4) If Stern is gonna talk politics, he's gotta become more sophisticated and avoid mindlessly spouting the talking points of @ellen and @jimmykimmel. (Mind you, I voted for Biden).

9/ @billmaher provides a good example of how one can be a Democrat and actually despise "sex symbol" (Stern's description) Andrew Cuomo. As it stands now, Stern's take on politics lacks the necessary nuance & sophistication to interest his listening audience.
5) Fire Marci Turk.

10/ It's clear after all these years she is supremely unqualified to run the Stern Show in any capacity. With Turk and Gary in charge, the Show will never pull itself out of its downward spiral. Maybe if Turk leaves, Stern Show staff members can go back to goofing on Stern when

11/ he mocks THEM on air. That was great radio. It was also a long time ago.
6) Fill the Jackie / Artie chair with an actual comedian. @NikkiGlaser or @helloross would work. They seem to enjoy doing the Show. Maybe alternate them for awhile to see who works better.
7) Re the

12/ interviews Stern does, the "Father Hunger" questions have to go. The "Was [blank] the love of your life?" questions have to go. Most importantly, not every interview has to run 2 hours. @ColinJost is not worth two hours. Neither is @machinegunkelly. Pretty much nobody

13/ should have an interview with Stern go two hours. Stern simply isn't that good of an interviewer. It seems as if the point of these endless interviews is to try and mine something/anything that Stern Show staffers can pitch to sketch website to try and make Stern relevant.

14/ (An impossible task, I've been trying for years to help Stern get relevant and in the news!). More & more Stern interviews come off like two old folks (Howard & Robin) in a nursing home all excited they have a guest and they're gonna be damned if that guest is gonna spend

15/ less than two hours with them.
8) Finally, @rqui has to go. As Robin Quivers' ability to communicate deteriorates, she evidently seems to believe that adopting a supercilious, haughty persona will distract Stern's audience from her rapid descent into what clearly is early

16/ dementia. Do we really need to hear a near 70 year old woman confess that she sometimes "pees" and/or "shits herself" when she "sneezes?" Do we need to hear that she "no longer masturbates?" @KarithFoster would be a great replacement.
If Foster isn't available, what about

17/ High Pitch Erik? How funny would it be to have a Wack Packer who regularly dismisses Robin with "Don't be feeble-minded, Robin" actually take her job? Erik deliberately tanked the IQ test, but the way Erik "owns" Robin on air is proof he has the higher IQ.

Memet, these are

18/ just a few suggestions. The point is that someone has to do an intervention, take Stern aside and inform him the show is unlistenable in its present form. I've committed to live tweeting the show until the current contract ends some 4 1/2 years from now so I have a vested

19/ interest in helping the Stern Show become less shitty. Even marginally less shitty. At this point I'd take 10% less shitty. Memet, how about you do that intervention? If @stutteringjohnm is the "Hero of the Stupid," you can become "Hero of Howard's Remaining Listeners."

20/ If not you, who? If not now, when?
Thank you.
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