I desperately need ppl, esp teens, who are sex repulsed to understand that their POV is both valid and unique to them, and that its really Fucking Shitty of them to moralize those feelings and demonize anyone into horny shit

sexuality is a spectrum and its Natural

Also really need them to understand that the issue isn't the fiction, it's how ppl try to transpose that fiction onto the real world, and the best way to combat that is More Information about practicing sexuality safely, NOT LESS. Informed Consent is Fucking Important

if informed consent cannot be obtained with a real, living, flesh and blood partner, what you're doing is unethical. That's it. That's the fucking line. That is what the goal should be; weeding out those who try to undermine informed consent

extreme fantasies can be explored solo and with consenting adults. The only way that can happen is with open, ethical discussion of those fantasies and we cannot Learn How To Do That and Weed Out The Fuckers Wanting To Pollute the Waters if you shitheads keep up this Puritan crap

I swear to fuck i make this thread every 3 months or some shit

but seriously tho, you cannot guilt-trip ppl into not being sexual. Its not gonna fucking work. Christians have been trying to do it for Generations and you know what it led to? Pedo Priest coverups. Why the fuck do you think you'll do any better?

Creating a culture built on purity, on absolute black and white morals with no wiggle room and no forgiveness CREATES the necessity to cover up transgressions, which leads to built in systems that PROTECT abusers.

So you're playing yourselves

Also we've known for decades that Freude didn't know shit about shit, so trying to pathologize sexuality and use it as like a smoking gun of 'oh this person is evil' bc of their kinks ALONE (not how they practice them) is junk science. Its not how the brain works.

y'all are just terrified by the complexity of the world and the way those complexities make protecting yourself and others harder, so you're trying to flatten reality into something easier for you to personally digest and sure, that's understandable, but it fucks other ppl over

you aren't that special, Jan, and your gut reaction to kinky shit does not make you right. More than that, you're actively harming others by forcing your beliefs on them and suppressing the discussions that could *actually* protect ppl from predators

And I cannot emphasize this enough, the current puritan fandom culture is creating *Safe Spaces* for abusers and just the hottest of beds for dysfunctional and depressing social cycles. Y'all are not creating healthy spaces. Y'all need to genuinely evaluate why you're doin this

you need to ask yourselves why you're participating in this, if it improves your lives, if ppl are taking advantage of you, if you've been suppressing parts of yourself to be part of the group, and what if anything you've Actually Gained

If the only thing it does is make you feel better than the ppl you're pitting yourself against? Congratulations; you've fallen into the very human trap of the in-group/out-group mentality and its never good, its fake confidence and its bad for your mental health

ALSO

also

Also

Fetishizing fictional things is *what you should do*. That's normal. That's part of masturbation. Creating fetish items is a natural expression fo sexuality. Fetishizing REAL PEOPLE is the problem. Again, this is why applying fiction to reality is the Real Issue

Real Individuals that you're interacting with should not be fetishized, which is why its important to DISCUSS when and how it's healthy to practice fetishes. Which is WHY its extremely fraught to have fetishes that correspond to IRL demographics or societal injustices

but again, GUILTING PEOPLE will not make those fetishes disappear. GUILT is a huge aspect of how fetishes *form* for fuck's sake. If you don't form healthy outlets (like, idk, FICTION) that protect vulnerable groups from being in contact w/fetishists DIRECTLY,

if you don't have systems to educate ppl on how to practice their fetishes responsibly, that's when being a sex pest is just the path of least resistance. So again. Fucking playing yourselves by moralizing sexuality and limiting conversations by making blanket statements re: Kink

This is why the onus is on the individual to navigate the web responsibly. BC ppl *need* outlets for their sexuality to be healthy and happy. And what we LACK in our society is ways to navigate those conversations responsibly, and Y'ALL AIN'T HELPING

Because I cannot stress this enough, when you expect ppl to just STOP being sexual, you fuck them up mentally. You fuck up their whole lives. You fuck up the society you're living in. You fuck over yourselves. This solution has been PROVEN NOT TO WORK.

And the reason ppl keep coming back to it is bc it's just the ground floor of problem solving. It's the solution with the least amount of critical thinking required. It is your favorite answer to the problem bc its the easiest for you and every system built from being lazy? SUCKS

Also for the love of fuck look into 'thought terminating cliches' cuz it is not an argument, it's a brainwashing tactic meant to shut down critical thinking and I fucking hate them so goddamn much

in conclusion;

Footloose may be one of the whitest dance movies in existence, but maybe y'all should watch it anyways bc apparently you need to be shown what happens when you strip a community of sex, drugs and rock and roll

PS, now that most sites DONT allow NSFW content and twitter has no good filters anyway, all the people who don't want minors to ever see anything sexual should really be pushing for kids to stay off twitter, regardless of the 13+ rating! You got tumblr, go back to it!

Everyone who likes porn locking down their accounts would not and could not protect minors from predators. The culture is the issue, and a large part of the culture is the taboo around sexuality and the lack of information about how to practice it in healthy ways

It also wouldn't protect the teens who do need to express their sexuality more than never not once at all. It would put them more at risk, bc they would be 'breaking' rules to access things their minds need. Predators are ALREADY taking advantage of those ppl

Teens take 'anyone who ships teenagers is a pedo' rhetoric at face value, it gets reinforced by m/aps and no/ma*ps who say hey, its ok, we're broken too. The 'community' so worried about their safety *created* that narrative to exploit

bc all sexuality is deviant, because the reality has been flattened, there is no way to judge nuance, no one telling them what the actual definition of pedophillia is, what behaviors are actually predatory and how to spot them and how to navigate sexual fiction safely

and forcing arbitrary rules onto adults will not weed out actual predators, it will not prepare teens and younger to spot when they're being taken advantage of, it will not help them mature into ppl comfortable with their sexuality, it is just yelling at strangers on the internet

it is just working yourself up into a frenzy and ruining your day, and probably several other ppls and continuing to pollute the culture with unfounded, uninformed, reactionary horseshit re: sexuality. Which people have. And need to express. And we could be doing that better

and safer, for everyone

but you have to be part of the fucking conversation. You cannot throw a tantrum and demand ppl fall in line bc you were/are a child and can't be expected to understand so its on us to shutter ourselves away so you can pretend you're safe

when it would not make you safe. That is not how we make you safe. That is not how you heal, that is not how you protect others.

If you want to actually improve shit you have to understand the full scope of reality and that means acknowledging things that upset you

and that what upsets you does not upset other ppl, and that their reaction is not your reaction and that has to factor into your decisions, bc you wont fix shit if you're constantly surprised that not everyone thinks or feels the way you do. You are not normal.

'Normal' has always and will always involve sexuality. That will branch into dangerous territory and involve sexual fetishes that are 'wrong' and 'gross' and saying that they should just not exist solves

nothing

it protects

no one

In fact, it leaves more vulnerable ppl out there in danger of being preyed on and being groomed into predators. Bc there is a cycle of abuse that cannot be broken if you keep ignoring it because its icky and wrong.

We have to acknowledge it to FIX IT.

and acknowledging that these fetishes do exist and cannot be magically willed away with capslock and insults and shame is not the same as CONDONING the people who use those fetishes to excuse inflicting harm on OTHER HUMAN BEINGS.

Acting like they are helps NO ONE.

It actively makes shit HARDER to fix

So yes, I do believe that pedo/incest/necro/rape fantasies belong in fiction. ONLY in fiction. And if people are in any way compelled to take them bEYOND fiction, they need fucking help. And we need systems THAT HELP THEM.

because the amount of ppl who have these because of trauma is more than 0 and they matter just as much as the ppl who react to trauma with being utterly repulsed. They are not worth LESS than you. And they CAN be helped and CAN fantasize in healthy ways, IF YOU WOULD LET THEM

I'm fucking serious, people are hurt bc sex is demonized. We have evidence we have sCIENCE we have thousands of years of human history to back this up. You are choosing the argument that makes you *feel* safest

and it will do nothing but more harm

so yes. Please change.

This is not me blaming you for what happened to you, or your friends, or anyone. You are not to blame. The people that hurt you are to blame.

This is me acknowledging that you have choices to make beyond that trauma that affect other ppl. This is me informing you.

And what you do with this information is in fact your responsibility. I am not responsible for how you process or respond. I am responsible for me. This is what I think is most ethical. I'm willing to listen and have further discussions bc I do genuinely care

Give me some arguments that don't suck. That take into account victims other than you or the ppl that agree with you. That recognize that adults outnumber kids on this platform with a TOS that states that porn is a-okay and that locking our shit would not protect you

Give me an argument with more than a surface level understanding of how ppl interact with fiction

bc we cannot address shit if we ignore it. We cannot protect ppl if we insist they do not exist or that they don't matter bc 'normal ppl' wouldn't act like them

You didn't make this mess and its not fair you got saddled with it, but neither did I, and we're both stuck with it now, so go have a cry and a snack and come back to me when you have some fucking worth while ideas