Bow: The Heart of the Best Friend Squad

What does it mean to be the “giving friend”?

A thread

Bow is seen as the heart of the bfs and the one that Adora and Glimmer rely on. He’s the one who supports them both, and provides them with the emotional assurance they both need. He’s the type of person who helps before he asks for help, and this only grows as the show continues

Bow is Glimmer’s only friend, and she relies on him for all aspects of emotional support. He’s there for her whenever he’s needed. But he never asks for the same in return. This is seen when it’s discovered he’s been living a double life this whole time and never told anyone.

The thing is, it isn’t for a lack of trying. Glimmer says she’s asked before but never never wants to talk about himself. This doesn’t make Glimmer a bad friend for not knowing this about Bow. It just shows how far Bow is willing to go himself without asking for help.

As a “giving friend” Bow thrives off helping people. It makes him happy! He wants to do what he can for the rebellion and doesn’t ask for anything in return. This becomes a problem though, when he gives to much of himself and realizes that no one is giving him anything in return.

In the bfs, he’s the mediator between Adora and Glimmer. He’s the one who helps them reorganize their thoughts and state them in a constructive manner. He diffuses conflict, keeps them safe, and provides them both with the emotional assurance they need.

From experience as a “giving friend” myself, the best way I can describe it is everyone has their own barrel of water. To support people you give them a cup of water from your barrel. And usually they give you one in return.

It may not be them supporting you, but it could be something in your friendship that makes your support feel validated. The issue is when you give away to much of your water and you get nothing in return. Your barrel goes dry. You burn out from trying to help the people you love.

In S4, Bow’s barrel is getting drier and drier each episode. He doesn’t even realize it until Boy’s Night Out when he’s in an environment outside of Adora and Glimmer’s conflict.

Bow realizes in this episode that he has been giving everything he has to his friends, and they haven’t even noticed he’s been kidnapped. He reaches a breaking point and says this:

Bow comes to the conclusion that no matter how much support he gives to his friends, he can’t solve their conflict for them and he can’t give everything he has in his barrel to support them. After this episode we start to see Bow take a step back from meditating their conflict.

Bow starts to make choices for himself, even though he knows it may hurt his friends because he’s reached a breaking point. He understands that he has prioritized his friend’s well being over his own and is changing his actions to better himself.

In S5, we see a Bow who is not ready to forgive Glimmer just because she needs his support. We see him finally prioritizing himself. Making sure his barrel doesn’t go dry again, and I think seeing that growth in a “giving friend” arc is so important to see.

In conclusion, check up on your “giving friends”, make sure that they are prioritizing themselves and ask them if they need support because they will never ask for it themselves. If you hate Bow hopefully this thread helps you understand his arc a little better