I find this incredibly funny. It's a smart shower! that sounds great. except... https://twitter.com/FoxRunTime/status/1382014745629360134

You can control it from the app!
which is great except WHY WOULD YOU WANT YOUR PHONE NEAR THE SHOWER

and you can control it with alexa and hey google!
great!
EXCEPT HOW CAN IT HEAR YOU OVER THE SHOWER

motherfucker if I, having an entire Human Brain (even a somewhat broken one), can't hear people talking over the sound of a shower, I'm pretty sure a god damn machine learning thing running on a 5$ arm chip can't figure out what I'm saying over the FWUSSSSH of a shower

It comes in several kinds, and the high end Q Collection is only available through "selected E-tail partners"

which is probably a furry thing

if you have a smart motorized tail for your fursuit, is that an e-tail?

which raises the same questions
are the e-tails google assistant/alexa enabled?
"hey google, wag my tail fast"

anyway the one with the screen that I want to figure out if it's Doomable is the Optic Q and the first hit for it on google is their official Optic Q page, and...

it's a big ol' 404

oh good it's god that all-important feature of "talk to your shower"

I found a youtube video to sell it to you

it is sending slightly mixed messages.
is the goal of this thing to let your dog talk to your shower? that's... ambitious

THE SHOWER ITSELF DOESN'T APPEAR UNTIL 31 SECONDS INTO THE VIDEO
THE VIDEO IS ONLY 52 SECONDS LONG

but yeah they're like "you can make a profile... for your dog!"

you know, in case your dog doesn't like the same pressure and temperature as Mum

anyway I haven't seen anywhere to buy it in FreedomBucks yet but this british seller has it for 730 £, or about a thousand dollars.

which is a bargain. your dog is worth it

I haven't seen any specs on this screen, but given that particular shade of blue I'm going to guess that it's a monochrome screen with an EL panel backlight

I have no idea how many pixels it has but it appears to be Plenty for Doom.
no idea what the CPU is, though.

HEY @AqualisaShowers send me one of these Optic Q shower controllers so I can tear it down and make it play Doom

yeah see all the pictures of it seem to be monochrome
it's just either that aqua color+white, or aqua+grey. It's gotta be monochrome.

oh hey! maybe it's doing that thing that some VTech toys do, where it's monochrome + an RGB backlight

anyway you rotate it or press it in

which is exactly how the Nest thermostat works. it's a Nest for the Shower, and 10$ says that was EXACTLY their pitch to the investors

SMART DIVERTER
for Smart Water

wait that's a brand of bottled water

please don't run your shower entirely on bottled water

I can't find a teardown
but one of their youtubes has this animation which I may be single-stepping through

also they didn't make it loop properly. Bastards.

hmm, yes, it appears to have Chips on a PCB

oh my god, it may actually be a color screen after all? or this picture is a lie

not only can I not find any teardowns, I can't find any videos of it that aren't clearly directly from AquaLisa marketing. So I don't even know if this thing is REAL

ahh yes, pair your remote to the shower
so you can remotely activate your shower
without using your phone?

it's an interesting screen shape.
it's a capsule! flat on top and bottom, rounded on the sides.

fun fact: I looked up the "capsule shape" to find out if there was a better name for just the 2D version of a capsule, and I didn't find it, but I did find out that the 3D version is also known as a SPHEROCYLINDER! which is the best name

there's not even any on ebay.
I think the only way to get one of these is to get a much more expensive Complete Shower Package from a plumbing supply store

but I will keep an eye out for these things and find out what they run and if I can, make it play Doom

it does seem they're UK only at the moment, though.

ok it's real. and net-spammy. https://twitter.com/cr3/status/1382060214296403970

take a moment to remember the brave soldiers the commonwealth lost in ww1

OH MY GOD YOU ARE A FUCKING SHOWER COMPANY WHY ARE YOU SHOWING POPPIES

and @cr3 confirms the display seems to be color and that it has a wifi network called "Espressif", which means it's an ESP32 or ESP8266.

Someone pointed out it is on http://ebay.co.uk , which I forgot to search. also, uh, canbus?
CANbus? IT RUNS ON THE CAR NETWORK!?

OR IS THIS A SPECIAL VERSION TO LET YOU INSTALL IT ON YOUR CAR?

oh damn I missed their Mixer Shower Webinar

their facebook is even better, because they celebrate International Cat Day

because nothing says "cats" like SHOWER COMPANIES

here's a picture of one that's clearly not done by the marketing team
it's also really blurry, probably because they're trying to take a picture IN A SHOWER

sometimes when you're making the first thing, you have to ask "is there a reason this is the first?"

Like, when I made the first Hairy Keyboard, I knew there was a very good reason it was the first.